Why do blondes where pigtails? Because they look nice.

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There once was an Asian kid who got a B+ in Math. He was later yelled at and beat by his parents.

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Roses are red Violets are blue One fish two fish Red fish blue fish

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one day 2 strawberrys walked to the ice cream store and ordered a small cup of banana ice cream they were realley happy they were later taken in and tortured and raped

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A dog walked into the forest and saw a whale in a puddle

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What makes a good jack-o-lantern? A pumpkin

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A visibly exhausted and distressed man walks into a bar and orders a strong drink. "Long day?" the bartender asks. Since the man understands the meanings of most common phrases he responds in the correct and expected manner.

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Roses are red Violets are buckets This poem makes no sense Boobs

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I dont know, are you a tomato?

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What do you do when you see Godzilla? You offer him ice cream.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? because the walk sign said to

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Why couldn't the old lady take her Afghan Hound to the vet after the dog had been brutally harassed? She was dead.

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Womans profesional lacrosse

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I farted!!!!! t'was smelly??????? I LIKE CRABS! #tomato problems

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What happens when a scientist tells you a lie? It's not true.

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what's one thing we're all tired of but they still make? Those crappy love songs.

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What do Jews suck? Because they lie, steal money, and start wars.

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What did the rabbi say to the priest? I respect your religion but have faith in judiasm.

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A man is about to rape a girl. Before penetration he carefully and correctly applies a condom as he practices safe sex and is not yet ready to father a child.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The chicken crossed the road accidentaly as chickens are absent minded.

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Bob was in trouble. He forgot his wedding anniversary. His wife was really pissed. She told him "Tomorrow morning, I expect to find a gift in the driveway that goes from 0 to 200 in 6 seconds AND IT BETTER BE THERE !!" The next morning he got up early and left for work. When his wife woke up, she looked out the window and sure enough there was a box gift-wrapped in the middle of the driveway. Confused, the wife put on her robe and ran out to the driveway, brought the box back in the house. She opened it and found a brand new bathroom scale. Bob has been missing since Friday.

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Why did the little kid fall off the rollercoaster? His dad threw him off.

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"We have such clean water we drink and do a lot of other stuff with it" The American said. "What other stuff do you do with your clean water" The African Child said. "Well we take showers in and we go to bathroom with it" The American said. "So let me get this straight you even take a Shit in it to" The African Child said.

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What's black,white, and red all over? Nothing, because if it is completely covered in red then it can only be red.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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