What do you call a hickey on your shoulder? Bad aim -Cooper Simpson

Sac

What just hit my face? The floor

On a scale of 1 to drunk how ten are you?

What is purple and crawls? A wounded grape.

Your mother is so stupid that she has an IQ score that is much lower than the average person.

Wal-mart didn't have the product I wanted. So I yelled at the manager until they had it. It didn't work and i was taken to jail.

Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A mosquito is a common insect in the family Culicidae. A blonde on the other hand is a Homo sapien, a primate species of mammal with a highly developed brain, belonging to the family of great apes, along with chimpanzees, bonobos, gorillas, and orangutans

WHO the FUK are Waseem ? and Jess ??!!!!

What type of ruler lies? A shatter resistant one

Why didn't the baby cry? It was stillborn.

what did the comedian tell the audience? a joke.

yo mamas so fat she weighs a lot.

What is less sanitary than eating food off of the ground? Anal sex.

What has 4 legs and doesn't bark? A dead dog.

What happens when you choke a smurf? Nothing, smurfs aren't real.

Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? not having an apple to find a worm im

What did the milk say to the oatmeal? I came from a cow nipple.

How can you tell if your goldfish is male or female? Put some fishfood in the bowl, if he swims to the food it's a male, if she swims to the food it's a female.

Why did the milkman die? Because everyone dies.

What is big, white, and hurts when it falls from the sky? A FRIDGE

Bumper Sticker: I Brake for Stop Signs

how many horses does it take to piss on a cat 17 beccause rape isnt real in somalia

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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