Q: whats the fastest way to a woman's heart? A: A knife to the ribs...

Roses are red, Violets are blue. Baby you think i loved you, but you got played too

why did the boy drown? because water entered his lungs and suffocated him.

Mmmmmmmmbutch

Hey i just met you and this is crazy Get in the van

Whats worse than a paper cut? Nine/Eleven

(insert command here) Oh yeah, well I want world peace.

What do you call the twin towers? An airport

what do you call dominic rolling down a hill?

How do you get four gay guys on a bar stool? With teamwork and coordination, each could place one foot on the seat, and they can all stand up using each other for balance and support. The fact that they are gay in unimportant.

What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Frostbite.

Your momma's so stupid that as a child she was often afraid to show her report card to her parents, for fear of their disapproval.

what do you do to get a guy to vomit?? kick him in the balls!

Why didn't Steve finish his homework? He didn't want to.

Yeah, I never intended to keep that a secret. What is autocast?

Punch line.

Q: What did one candle say to the other? A: Nothing, the mere thought of candles being able to possess the ability of speech is preposterous beyond any of the highest capabilities known to man.

Why did the tree stay home from school? Because, trees don't have school.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

knock knock Come in!!!

How many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop? Ask the starving African.

What is the difference between Boyscouts and Jews? Boyscouts come home from camp.

Why did the lizard cross the road? Because he was stapled to the chicken.

Have you heard the one about the Norwegian? He killed 98 people.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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