Tom buys his wife Mary the latest Eco friendly car. The car is said to get well over 100 miles on a tank of gas. A week later, Tom is stunned to learn that while Mary was driving to the supermarket the car ran out of gas. The tank was full and Mary only drove 5 miles. How is this possible? Mary was involved in a horrible car accident. The gas tank immediately emptied and set fire to Mary and her baby.

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What did the Priest say to the Rabbi? Nothing. The Priest was mute and the Rabbi was deaf.

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Whats green, lies in a ditch, and is covered in cookie crumbs? A girl scout that got hit by a car

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What do you get when you cross The Incredible Hulk and King Kong? Two angry fictional characters.

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What do you do when a black person steals your computer Inform the authorities, as theft is a felony.

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What do u call a black man playing a jumping sport? I don't know but it is totally normal.

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There was a seal and polar bear on the same iceberg. The polar bear turns to the seal and says "Roar!!" Then the polar bear ate the seal.

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Q: what do you call a bunch of dead accountants? A: the holacost.

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A man walks into a bar, he begins drinking and returns home visably drunk. His family disowns him as he is a recovering alchoholic who was three months sober.

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if a fat man in a red suit puts you in a bag at night. its not santa your getting raped

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What do you call a black man who walks into a jail cell? A hard working and dedicated police officer who was just putting his first offender in jail.

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A boy has a penis, a girl has a vagina.

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Why did the British person go to the dentist? He had a poor diet which led to him getting cavities

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Men's Sports

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A mexican Police officer walks into a crime scene. "Ouch." he exclaims, rubbing his forehead where a red bump is already surfacing.

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what did the terorist do when he went out side blew up

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What starts with a P and ends with a O-R-N? Popcorn

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Busted? What the hell is going on?

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why are black people so good at basketball? because they all can run jump steal and shoot

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A boy walks up to a girl and says "Do you like ice cream? Cuz I have a huuuuuge penis."

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Where did Susie go after an explosion? Everywhere

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A girlfriend scolds her boyfriend for "sitting on anti-joke all day." He then explains how it is impossible to sit on something that exists purely in digital form and instead noted it would be more correct to say sitting at a desk all day. She complied and saw the error of her ways.

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What's the difference between a dead cat and a dead woman? It is much more unlikely that you would have sex with a dead cat.

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The Mexican word of the day is JUICY. Tell me if juicy see the cops.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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