Two men walk in to a bar, one buys a beer. The second receives a phone call and leaves.

Your mom is fat

What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Frostbite.

The bear woke up after his long hibernation of the winter. "Boy, am I hungry!" The bear wandered around and ate some berries. "These blackberries are too bitter and unripe for my taste, I'll go eat something else." He stumbled upon a honeybee hive and took some honey out and ate it. He was swarmed and stung by many of those bees. "That wasn't my favorite batch of honey, I'm still pretty hungry, let me go find some other food. He came across a cabin in the woods. "There maybe some food in there." To some, this was known as the Northern Vermont Massacre. It was a tragic happening. The 7 membered family, the Hernandez family, all died that day. The bear chase all of the adult and children and the house and brutally ate them.

Your momma is so old, she has lived a wonderful, long life and witness a lot of human achievement.

A man walks into a bar and the bartender says "What'll it be?" The man quietly gazes out at the other people in the bar. He continues to do this for a while, until eventually the bartender calmly taps him on the shoulder to get his attention, and the man turns to look over at him. "What can I get you today?" He asks the man. "What?" the man replies. Turns out he's deaf. Who knew?

Two cats were in a bathtub. They both, however, were uneasy the whole time, as it is common sense to know that cats do not like being in water.

Why couldn't the blonde screw in the light bulb?? - she happened to be autistic

Ask me if I'm an orange. Are you an orange? No.

You're Adopted.

why cant helen keller drive? because cars werent popularly accepted when she lived.

whats better then 10 babies nailed to 1 tree... 1 baby nailed to 10 trees!

roses are red, violets are blue, f*** you wh*re

why did the chicken cross the road? orange you glad I didn't say banana

fack me in the ace! CC

What do Chinese people call Chinese food? Food.

maths is annoying!!! LIKE if you agree!!!!! :D

A drunk is pissing on the plaza and the cop stands next to him and says, very nice. The drunk says, that's what she said. : )

Roses are red Violets are red Shit My garden's on fire?

What was the tallest mountain before Mount Everest was discovered? Mount Everest

How do you stop a clown from laughing? Drive an ax through its head.

Why was the white man poor? Because he could not hold a stable job for his wife and kids.

How do you say vampire in spanish? Vampiro.

What do you call a black man driving a bus? By his name

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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