How did Elmo get his show? Because the kids loved his furry ass and hoped to be on with dorthy

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There are two types of people in this world: those who can count and those who can't. I happen to be one of those who can.

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Why wouldn't you want OJ Simpson babysitting your kids? Why? He's in jail and he wouldn't be available when you needed him

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A man attempts to sign in to PlayStation Network... And succeeds, proceeding to enjoy the console's numerous award winning exclusive titles such as LittleBigPlanet and Uncharted 2, along with utilizing the system's Blu Ray capabilities and playing with his friends online in an absolutely free network, on what many consider to be the superior console to the Xbox 360.

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Wanna hear a dirty joke? A pig rolls in the mud.

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Why was the black man scared of the chainsaw? Because his father was killed by one when he landed on it when he fell of his ladder that was holding him up while he was cutting the limbs of a tree.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? because he was hungry and mcdonalds was across the street

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"Who stole the cookies from the cookie jar?" said the little girl. "I don't know", said the mother," we were robbed of all our money and posessions. And your father was killed while we were gone.

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what do you call a homeless man? poor.

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Iggy Azalea

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Knock Knock Who's There? Hi, I'm just going through the neighborhood to let everyone know that women secretly enjoy being raped.

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Whats the best part about 23 year olds? Theres 20 of them

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what did the chicken cross the road? because its a chicken

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What did the man say when he found out he had cancer? Nothing. He was so in shock, that he later died from another type of cancer.

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Q: Why did the cookie go to the doctor? A: Because he had brain cancer.

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what did the little boy say to little girl? I shit bricks.

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If I have 7 oranges in one hand and 8 oranges in the other, what do I have? Big hands!

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A man walks into a bar, and has to go to the hospital because he broke his nose.

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this kid named terry was sitting in computer class then he got punched in the face

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What's worse than a murderer? Two murderers.

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Your Momma is so old, she started exercising more and eating healthier to increase the chance of her living long enough to enjoy your own children's lives.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? -Why? I don't know,I'm asking you the question.

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You wanna hear a funny joke? Sorry, but I'm really not a funny guy. Not a comedian, you know.

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If there are 3 apples, and you take 2, how many do you have? BLAM! Texas castle law, motherfukker!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops