A giant watermelon falls on a man He's dead

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What is brown and sticky? A stick

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A priest and a prostitute are sitting next to each other on a bus. The priest asks her what she does, and she says "I sell my body to strange men." The priest then explains to her about Christianity, and she gives up her ways and becomes a devout Christian.

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Why did the man not go to church? He was an atheist.

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what's worse than a dead baby in the bathtub? if the baby was named Grace.

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Deadly cancer.

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A duck sits down at a bar and orders a drink. After he finishes, he gets up to leave, when the bartender says, "Excuse me, sir, but you didn't pay for your drink." The duck turned around and said, "I'm sorry, I forgot." So he paid the bartender for the drink and left him a nice tip, and left the bar in a good mood.

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You's so ugly you should consider facial reconstruction surgery if it's covered by your insurance.

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What's black, white, and red all over? The color scheme. Except for the black and white. They're shades.

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What did the officer say to the black man? You're under arrest.

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Why was the Mexican socially inept. Because he hadn't recieved a good education

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Person 1: Knock Knock Person 2: ...... Person 1: Knock Knock Person 2: ...... Person 1: Knock Knock Person 2: ...... Person 1 leaves because no one is answering the door

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Chuck Norris is an average human being!

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how do u make an infant cry? hit it in the face with a full grown salmon.

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Roses are violets red is blue i like lizards they have fur

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how do you get a mexican to fall off of a cliff? you push them off

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Roses are red Violets are blue Refrigerators come in an assortment of colors

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so a mom is like so what you want hunny and the dad goes like you baby bahahahahaa get it?

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What's the difference between gays and straights? Sexual orientation

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you ever hear the joke about the rabbi, the pope and an elephant? No? well its a good one...

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why did the grandpa drop his big mak??? Because an army tank hit him

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Why is a bulldog so aggressive Because it was raised for dog fights in basements Dog fights aren't right kids, and you should never get involved but if you find yourself in the cage fighting one of the dogs, you should really think about how you got there.

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Back when I was your age, we had to entertain ourselves with video games and TV.

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eloise dey.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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