What did one muffin say to the other muffin? Nothing, muffins are inanimate objects and can therefore not speak.

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Why did the man have 3 girlfriends? A: because he is a womanizer

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How do you fit four gay on a bar stool? Divide the given space into fourths and convince them to share it accordingly. However, due to the fact that bar stools are significantly smaller than the average chair, and the likelihood that the bar has the resources to provide chairs for all of their customers, it would be highly unlikely that the men would choose be remain seated in such an inconvenient manner.

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What's brown and sticky? Human excrement.

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why did the little girl fall off the swing - she had no arms.

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Why do chinese firefighters wear white belts in their firefighting uniforms? So the their pants stay up.

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if a dinosaurs could talk, what would they say nothing their all dead

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why did the chicken not cross the road? He ran

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why did the kid fall over and break his neck? Because he slipped on the ice-cream from the kid who got hit by a bus.

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Once upon a time, your face.

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Why does Brianne cry? Because she has no family.

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9/11

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There was a goat and it was eating McDonalds, I just farted and my nuts are itchy.

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whats red that looks like ketchup taste like ketchup and is't tomato sorce? ketchup

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I'm the rubber and you're the glue, whatever you say sends vibrations through the air that hit my eardrum and my brain interprets these vibrations as what your are saying.

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Why can't the t-Rex clap..... Because it is dead

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Why Did The Girl Cry? Old People Are Funny.

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Two gay guys walk into a Hooters... They order cheese fries and enjoy their meal.

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Yes and no, I am into literature, I am a writer, of how to rape and kill guides for the whole family (raping the whole family that is, again instructions for the whole family with inspirational quotes) Now give an example of each book to each family member without a cover stating what the book is... ...And after the first time, the world was never the same again.

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Knock knock. Who's there? I'm insecure about my body.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was blind and deaf.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I have not seen chicken since I was very young, on my parents' farm. This is before the Cossacks slaughtered them. I can still hear screams of sister as soldiers ravaged her. But back to question, where did you see chicken? I am very, very hungry.

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Why did the black man fall off the building? The building was one of the twin towers and the event 9/11 was currently happening and he saw one of the planes coming at him so he decided to jump to his misery instead because he thought it will hurt less, also he thought that if he waited for the plane to hit him there is a possibility that one of the wings may hit him right on the neck and his head will get chopped off and he wanted to die with his body completely attached.

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I'm so hungry I could eat food

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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