Roses are red Violets are red Oh god I'm bleeding It's getting in my eyes

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She never got her drivers license.

What did the little boy with cancer say right before he died? Nothing. He was very sick and could not speak at all during his final weeks.

what did the cat say when he walked into a room full of dogs? Get meowt of here!

why did the lion get lost? because the jungle is massive.

Knock Knock Whos there? The police, we've been getting reports of many ironically named metaphors knocking on your door to which you reply witty utterances, can you explain this frankly quite disturbing behaviour? The police, we've been getting reports of many ironically named metaphors knocking on your door to which you reply witty utterances, can you explain this frankly quite disturbing behaviour who? Wait aren't you the one who's supposed to supposed tell the punchline? Oh Yeah

William and Kate do get off their ass and do something useful for once instead of hogging the cover of intouch magazine.

I love you, you live me. Now get the FUDGE out of the tree!!!

Why did the Asian man have a small penis? Because he was flaccid.

How do you make a clown sad? Kill his family.

Why was the teacher laying on the floor? Because shes dead...

Knock knock Who's There? Idk, who the **** names their kid There?

the Holocaust. Because anything involving the Holocaust is automatically an anti joke. the Holocaust wasn't funny.

Q: John has 400 cookies, 200 hundred are chocolate chip and the rest are sugar. John eats 100 of each, what does he have now? A: Diabetes

What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

wat?

What's tastier than a dead baby? An orphaned dead baby.

whats worse that 3 black guys dieing in a train accident .... one was ur brother the other was gay

A blonde, brunette and redhead are stuck on an island that is a mile away from any civilisation.The blonde decides to swim to find help. The blonde swims half a mile, has a rest and then carries on swimming.

Why did the man cross the road? Because that it where his friend Bob lives.

A doctor walks out of the delivery room and relieves A nervous father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happiness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with the rest of what he had to relay to the father. Your wife died during the delivery.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he happened to be walking in that general direction.

Im ashamed of being from Canada

why did the man die? because he died.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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