Roses are red, white, pink, and many other colors. Violets similarly display many color variations due to generations of ardent florists.

I like my women the way I like my coffee: Without a penis.

What do you call a pig with one eye? A pig.

Heartlight

vagina, hehehehehehehe

How do you wake up lady gaga? Set an alarm for an appropriate time

Two men are sitting on a park bench discussing the anatomy of goats. Where is Bertha? Teaching the principals of mathematics to blind orphins in Moscow, Russia.

How do you scare a blonde woman? Tie her up and mutilate her family while she watches.

ecks! why zee?

What's green and gets people high? A green helicopter

Four homosexuals walk into a bar. They notice that there's only one stool left at the bar itself. They sat at a table with four chairs. They had a delightful time.

Did you hear about the deer? He had antlers. If antlers where a kind of disease, that would be a pun.

How do you do you cure cancer? Very carefully.

Where did the moon get its degree? Unfortunately, they haven't installed any colleges for planetary satellites yet.

I took a dump in a well don't ask me i'll never tell i look to u as it fell and now its in the well Hey,i just took a dump and it smells like crazy so here's my number so call the plumber Call the plumber

Q: what's brown and rhymes with snoop? A: Dr. Dre

- How can you call a person, who hasn't got a left eye, a left hand and a left leg? - All right.

Why was O.J acquitted for murder? A jury of his peers deliberated for many days and found there was not sufficient evidence for his conviction.

A man walks into a bar and the bartender says "What'll it be?" The man quietly gazes out at the other people in the bar. He continues to do this for a while, until eventually the bartender calmly taps him on the shoulder to get his attention, and the man turns to look over at him. "What can I get you today?" He asks the man. "What?" the man replies. Turns out he's deaf. Who knew?

A man walks into a bar. He asked the bartender if he accepts $100 bills. The bartender says "no".

Always put punctuation at the end of your sentence

What did the black guy, the latino guy, and the asian guy all have in common? They were all human beings

What's brown and smells like poop? A monkey.

A Jew walks into a bar. He quickly works on treating the injuries he had received from hitting his head against the bar when he had walked into it.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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