Why was the 45 year old man crying? He shit his pants.

So two friends walk into a bar. One says to the bartender, "Get me a Miller Lite please." The bartender says, "Sure." The other friend says, "Get me a Cosmopolitan please." The bartender stares at him and says, "That is not the drink I was expecting you to order, but I respect your decision."

Why doesn't a woman need a wrist watch? It is rapidly becoming outdated and most cellphones these days have the time, but if they like the style they are free to use one.

"life is like a box of chocolates", except you cant eat life and hocolate doesnt rain on you.

Is this where I type the joke?

What did the four pigs do at the farm? Roll in mud.

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was a registered six affender.

A blonde and a brunette both starred in a TV show.. It was called Beavis and Butthead.

what do you call a man with three eyes and eleven fingers? his name

What do you tell a Woman with black eyes? Nothing you've already told her twice.

Why did the chicken cross the road? The Holocaust.

Why was Ray Charles always smiling? He was Happy

A man walks into a hospital with a panicked expression, and rushes to his doctor's office. "Doctor, I am in tremendous pain when I breath!" "Hmm, seems to be a lung problem, take one of these antibiotics twice a day." "Thank you so much!" "Oh yah! Your family was brutally killed in a sixteen car pile up."

what's the difference between fulham and sunderland ? hugh grant and lilly allen's dad

What do you call a kid on crutches? Crippled

Your mother is so stupid, she is unable to uphold a steady job and cannot support you financially.

How many dead babies can fit in a dead horse 11

Jingle bells Batman smells WHERE IS SHE??!!?!?!?

LO LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOPLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOO O O O O O O OLO LOL OL O LO LO LO L OL -LOL GUY

Why can't Helen Keller Drive? Because she's a women. Why can't Stephen Hawking speak freely with his voice? Because he's autistic.

Why did the house stink? There were decomposing bodies under the floor boards.

Whats the difference between a ferrari and a boner? Too much to list.

(Put joke here)

Your mother is so ugly that she looks like you.. :)

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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