keep your eye off me if you dont look at me, how do you know i looked at you? there is a mirror

How do you pleasure your grandmother? Ask your brother

An Irishman, a homosexual and a Jew walk into a bar. Paddy's really exploring his options lately.

Roses are red, violets are blue. Cassidy's a whore so open the door.

whatts blue and fuzzy? Blue fuzz

A Black Man walks into a bar...

A boy has a penis, a girl has a vagina.

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He was hit by a bus.

Ipod to earbuds: "hey buds" earbuds response: "sup player"

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know. He values his privacy and will not tell me his motives.

Two hunters are out in the woods, one of them collapses on the ground and his eyes roll back in his head. His friend whips out his cell phone and calls 911. He gasps,"I think my friend is dead, what do i do?" The operator says,"calm down lets first make sure he's dead." There's a silence, then a shot. Sadly the man was not dead but extremely tired and could not carry on without rest.

Yo mama so fat, that when she wore a blue swimsuit to the beach and swam, the Blue Whales started sing, "WE ARE FAAMILY...EVEN THOUGH UR BUGGER THAN ME!!!"

how do kill a black guy? shoot him in the face

When is a door not a door? Never. a door is always a door. it cannot be anything else.

Mail | Print | Vote | Daft Punk Superheroes Lyrics Send "Superheroes" Ringtone to your Cell Songwriters: BANGALTER, THOMAS / CHRISTO, GUY MANUEL HOMEM / MANILOW, BARRY / PANZER, MARTIN Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air Something In The Air

What is worse than running away from a rapist? Getting raped by a rapist.

Deadly cancer.

Knock,knock whose there? The pizza delivery guy the pizza delivery guy who the pizza delivery guy who didnt give you your pizza

I'm on the seafood diet, a large proportion of my daily food intake consists of fish.

Wanna hear a joke? Joe Jonas.

How do you make a doctor cry? Kill his family.

How did jimmy get hurt?? someone throw a fridge at him..

how many mice does it take to screw in a lightbulb just 2 but it beats me how they got in there

What did the four pigs do at the farm? Roll in mud.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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