Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he can't fly

How do you make a clown cry? Kill his wife and kids.

A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks, why the long face? The man replies "i have a huge malignant tumor in my chin"

whats arrogant, has blonde hair and belongs in the kitchen? Gordon Ramsay

Yo mama's so stupid.....................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................uh jk

Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme Others don't

i am a dwarf i have a big nose im a ranga nice to meet you julia

Paperclip... BANANA?!

What is the difference between a pizza and the Jews? The pizza doesn't scream when you put it in the oven.

Oh no! I forgot the milk!

why did the little girl fall off the swing - she had no arms.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, this joke sucks.

Knock, knock. You do realize you can actually physically knock on the door instead of just imitating the sound effect with your mouth, right? It's actually way more effective that way. Just saying, since it's raining outside and you're cold and want to come in...

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

why do pedo's molest children? because it feels really good.

What is green with wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? A stimulus in the environment to the receptors in his fingers caused his hand to open no longer gripping the ice cream. Due to this, the ice cream fell to the ground causing a desirable mess for someone to clean up, satisfying themselves with the fact that they have considered the environment during this small ''could happen to anybody'' situation. After the messed was cleaned up, the boy's mother bought him another ice cream, in which case the boy anticipated another potential mess, and held the ice cream carefully. As he did this, he managed to finish eating the whole of the ice cream, allowing no money that was paid for the product to go to waste.

I'm so hungry I could eat food

Women's rights.

What did jell say to the carriage driver from Uzbekistan that was underpaid and had no banter? Oh My God ROFLMAOOTG (the last three are "on the ground") "I will beat you with a small child that I will soon feed to the T-Rex's" should be on the list.

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

It is the conjoining of the two possible outcomes of the interstellar and post modern possibilities of the pasta sex god's niece's favorite colour after she falls off her bike whilst riding down a yellow slide after her twenty-seventh birthday when the two suns form a triangle in the night sky over the delta. Yes indeed that was good pudding.

Why did the girl throw butter out the window? She was suffering from an epileptic seizure.

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was blind and deaf.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...