Bill:Ask me to do something. Bob:Go get me a beer Bill:Would you like fries with that?

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Your mom is so fat that she is at risk for type two diabetes.

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knock knock knocking on heavens douoor

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Hey my names cliff. You should drop by sometime

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What's better than winning the Special Olympics? Having legs.

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What has 8 legs , 6 eyes and 3 mouths ? - A cowboy riding a horse while holding a chicken .

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If you like this song so much why don't you marry it? Because a divorce would be tough on the kids

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? The answer is not definitive and involves several factors including the size of the woodchuck, the woodchuck's teeth, the climate in which that woodchuck lives, and the tenacity of that particular woodchuck at achieving his goal.

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dead battery come on down

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Roses are red, violets are blue God made me beautiful, how about you?

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What's blue and pillowy? A blue pillow

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Does your face hurt? Because if it does, you might want to see a doctor.

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What did the boy have for lunch? A sandwich.

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how many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop!? thats what she said

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Why do men find it difficult to make eye contact? Some men are blind.

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a kid calls 911 and says ,"is this 911?" and the operator says ,"NO! THIS IS PATRICK!!!!!!"

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Why doesn't Michael Jackson like toast? Because he's dead.

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a blonde, brunette and a red head are all goin to jump off a bridge and turn into something. the brunette jumps and says fish, and she turns into a fish. the red head says eagle and becomes an eagle. the blonde gets a running start, but then trips on the way off and she says shit and turns into a piece of shit.

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How do you keep a black man from robbing your house? Lock your doors, or perhaps get a update-to-date security system.

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If pro is the opposite of con, then what is the opposite of progress? Digress

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your moms tits are so big she may have breast cancer she may have breast cancer which takes approximitely 300,000 lives per year

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Roses are red Violets are blue your mum is fat and so are you

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An elephant walks into a bar..what the hell

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How do you scare a blonde? Put the barrel of a gun to the side of her head.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops