What do you call a black thing hanging from a tree A tire swing

Why are the British so uptight? I don't think they are.

Why did the banana go to the hospital? It didnt, bananas cannot speak or walk. It is a simple fact so you should know.

-Have you ever eaten Ethiopian food? -No -Niether have they

How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his family.

Woman's rights

Gianni

Why was the women out of the kitchen? She felt the desire to relax after a day of work...

Why didn't the restaurant serve the black man? He hadn't ordered anything.

who hooks up with grade 7's? •Jake Muchnik

A baby tastes grapefruit juice for the first time. She is allergic and immediately begins convulsing and dies.

knock knock whos there !!!!!.....WE.....ARE.......SPARTANSSSS.....!!!!!!

Doctor: Knock knock... Patient: Who's there? Doctor: Interrupting doctor... Patient: Interrupting doct-- Doctor: You have cancer.

why the woman scream when she arrived at her surprise party? Everyone was dead!

Knock knock Who's there? Yo mamma Nobody's home, go away mom

Thomas the Tank Engine could see Express up ahead on the tracks! His driver shut off steam and applied his brakes. Ahead of him Gordon groaned "Ohhhhh stop your train! Stop your train! His driver and fireman jumped out quickly. Thomas tried his very hardest and eventually found himself slowing down. But there wasn't enough time and Thomas smashed right into the express. Seven people were killed and Thomas himself was smashed to pieces.

A young gay man comes out of the closet to his conservative, Christian parents. Everything went better than expected.

A black man and a mexican man are in a car. Who is driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken off from their law firm. The mexican, Alex, had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. Rain had suddenly come upon them and a passing off-duty police officer had picked them up and took them to a nearby hotel. The three men had drinks and the friends had a wonderful rest of their trip. Alex, however never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months after their return John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation. John was never the same.

An Irish man walks out of a bra.

What did the man say to his doctor? AHHH AHHHHH OH MY GOD! AHHH OUCH HOLY SHIT FUUUUUUCK!!!... ____/\_____/\_____/\___________________

Walruses are basically saber-toothed seals. That does not affect the fact that they are awesome.

What's the difference between women and a bucket? before 1923, women didn't have the right to vote. Bucket's still don't.

Why did the man rob a bank? Because he was poor.

how do you make a plummer cry? you kill his family

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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