Wanna know what my grandma said before she kicked the bucket? Hey grandson, how far do you think I can kick this bucket?

What do you eat for breakfast and is sometimes blue? Pancakes.

Roses are red Roses are pink Roses are yellow Roses are white

You can eat a pie. You can eat a chicken. But you cannot eat a human being because that would be called cannibalism and cannibalism is a felony that can give the government a right to hold you in an international detainment facility for up to 40 years.

what did the angry asian man do after chrashing his car? He died later in the hospital that night from a combination of severe head trauma, internal bleeding, and various fractures.

what did the black guy say to the other black guy? good morning

What was the worst part about the Holocaust? -When it ended

Roses are Red Violets are blue Goldfish

what is hollow and bloody? Vagina when it gets genital herpes

How many Puerto Ricans does it take to clog the treads of my tank? Eight

did you hear about the guy who lost his left arm and left leg? he's all right now

Q: Why was Tigger looking in the toilet? A: He was looking for pooh

Knock Knock Who's there? Frank Frank who? I killed your grandma

William and Kate do get off their ass and do something useful for once instead of hogging the cover of intouch magazine.

Knock Knock There was no answer as the house was empty.

WHO IS A CHIKEN???????????? I AM do you got a problem with that!!!!!!

Yes and no, I am into literature, I am a writer, of how to rape and kill guides for the whole family (raping the whole family that is, again instructions for the whole family with inspirational quotes) Now give an example of each book to each family member without a cover stating what the book is... ...And after the first time, the world was never the same again.

Phillip has 200 pieces of candy, Phillip eats 185 pieces of that candy, what does Phillip have left? Diabetes, Phillip has diabetes.

Why did Helen Keller cross the road? BECAUSE SHE WAS A BITCH!

Why didn't the hungry woman get up and make herself some food? She has Lou Gehrig disease and any movement she makes results in excruciating pain.

Haikus are rigid, Their structure gives them beauty, And if you ignore the structure they kind of don't make sense and are bad.

Why did the man have 3 girlfriends? A: because he is a womanizer

what do you call a pig that knows karate? pork-chop!

What is the favorite song of Lady Di? no, that is a dead person and must be respected.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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