What do you do when your dishwasher stops working? Get it repaired.

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a man died

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What is the favorite song of Lady Di? no, that is a dead person and must be respected.

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Q. How much wood would a Wood-Chuck chuck if a Wood-Chuck could chuck wood? A. Wood-Chuck's clearly cant chuck would so what is the point of trying to figure out a question that would never take place in real life?

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Knock Knock Who's there? Frank Frank who? I killed your grandma

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You can eat a pie. You can eat a chicken. But you cannot eat a human being because that would be called cannibalism and cannibalism is a felony that can give the government a right to hold you in an international detainment facility for up to 40 years.

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What do you get when you cross The Incredible Hulk and King Kong? Two angry fictional characters.

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what do you call a black man on the moon? Kid Cudi

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What's the difference between a Ferrari and a dumpster full of dead babies? There isn't a Ferrari in my garage.

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Jake: "Guys Apple's new phone is going to be curved." Bob: "Who makes curved phones?" Jake: "Apple."

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Haikus are rigid, Their structure gives them beauty, And if you ignore the structure they kind of don't make sense and are bad.

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I used to be an adventurer like you... then I enlisted for much safer guard service with a more steady salary.

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Seen the new batman movie? [spoiler] the audience dies

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What do you call a white person on a leash? A toddler.

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Knock knock. Who's there?

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Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? A stimulus in the environment to the receptors in his fingers caused his hand to open no longer gripping the ice cream. Due to this, the ice cream fell to the ground causing a desirable mess for someone to clean up, satisfying themselves with the fact that they have considered the environment during this small ''could happen to anybody'' situation. After the messed was cleaned up, the boy's mother bought him another ice cream, in which case the boy anticipated another potential mess, and held the ice cream carefully. As he did this, he managed to finish eating the whole of the ice cream, allowing no money that was paid for the product to go to waste.

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Gues what makes me smile Mouth muscles

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"Knock Knock" "Who the hell is it?" "Patri..." "Go the hell away!"

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Why did Justin Beiber cross the road? He didn't because he is still in the closet!

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Roses are red Roses are pink Roses are yellow Roses are white

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why did the chicken not cross the road? He ran

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what do you call a disabled black man getting beat up? an unfortunate human

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Why did the man have 3 girlfriends? A: because he is a womanizer

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Q: What's blue and thrashes about on the floor? A: A blue plastic bag in the wind.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops