Once upon a time, a story teller used the "once upon a time" metaphor in order to tell you your parents have died in a terrible accident

what's black and blue and has red all over it? A dead body ^_^

What is large, white, and can't climb trees? A refrigerator.

how do you kill a blonde? the way you would kill anyone, here are some examples gun knife noose or orange. wait wtf who kills someone with an orange

If i could rearrange the alphabet, i'd put my penis in your mouth

Why did the black lady yell? She was being raped.

I have Alzheimer. What?

Why do firemen wear red suspenders? If they didn't, their turnout gear would not effectively protect them from flames.

a drumset fell off a clif. Badoom ch.

A dog goes to his food bowl. He eats his dinner.

What is less sanitary than eating food off of the ground? Anal sex.

Why are you reading this? You should be taking a shower, you smell like crap.

Your mother is so fat........... that she is morbidly obese and is at severe risk for diabetes and other weight related diseases.

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A pizza doesn't scream in the oven. Ha ha ha ha

3 Mormon men walk by a blonde woman eating a banana. They are not distracted by this and continue their journey of spreading Christianity.

Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Oh, then I'm not opening the door.

What did the boy with no arms get for christmas? heart worms

Whats the difference between ice cream and dead babies? I'm not eating ice cream right now.

Why did the deer die Because Jupiter is incapable of supporting life

A

What's red and smells like green paint? The rotting corpse of the old lady I poisoned with green paint.

your father died

What would Guy and Hemech's reactions be if they saw this joke up? They would see it from the newest jokes

What's meaner than taking candy from a baby? Throwing the baby off a cliff.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...