How do you fit 45 Jews into a car? 5 in the car 40 in the ashtray.

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47

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I walked into a bar the other day and ordered a double. The bartender brought out a guy who looked just like me.

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knock knock who's there? i eat mop I eat mop who?

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what do men with small penises use as condoms? appropriately sized condoms.

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What is the biggest fictional book ever made? Either the Bible, or the Dictionary.

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When life gives you lemons you get sugar and water and make some good lemonaide.

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Why'd the chicken cross the road? Why? To get to the gay guys house. Knock Knock! Who's there? The chicken.

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What's green and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

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Did you know Hellen Keller had a tree house? No Neither did she

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what did the crippled boy say to the truck driver? "i like cats."

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How do you survive in the wilderness? You nail an orphan to a rock underwater.

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A man walks into a bar and the bartender says "Sorry sir we're closed" So the man goes: "Oh, okay. I wasn't sure if you guys were open till' 10pm tonight" and the bartender goes "Only on the weekends" The man thanks the bartender and proceeded to leave the bar. He now knows the arrive earlier the following day.

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knock knock who's there aids

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Knock knock.* Who is it? The police. We have news that your daughter was molested and will never been seen again for the man who stole her has takin' her out of our jurisdiction.

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A cow was very inconveniently standing in the middle of a golf course. An alligator dragged the cow into a swamp. The cow dies

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four nazis are walking towards this jew. as soon as the first nazi came in arms reach of the jew he and his friends started to maliciously hug the jew.......................................and then 20 years later they killed his family.

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How many penises is one metric butt-load. Oh God I hope you don't know the answer.

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What's the difference between red paint and blue paint? One looks like blood and is used a lot in restaurants. The other is blue.

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How do you get straight A's? Try really hard throughout the school year and when it comes to the exams study enough to ensure you understand all the material, but so so much as to compromise your sleeping pattern, and in turn, your performance on the day.

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Henry: Say the word "really". Moe: Really. Henry: Now say the word "really" with sarcasm. Moe: Really? Henry: More sarcasm! I want you to be very sarcastic! Moe: Oh really??? Henry: There ya go!

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What is brown and sticky? Black tar heroin.

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whats worse than shitting in a urinal??? shitting in a shower

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I walked a few Km from home.. Something stops me in my tracks, there lies A LIE!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops