Yo mama so fat, she was accepted to a clinical trial for treatment of morbid obesity in middle-aged women.

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Why didn't the hungry woman get up and make herself some food? She has Lou Gehrig disease and any movement she makes results in excruciating pain.

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You can eat a pie. You can eat a chicken. But you cannot eat a human being because that would be called cannibalism and cannibalism is a felony that can give the government a right to hold you in an international detainment facility for up to 40 years.

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what did the angry asian man do after chrashing his car? He died later in the hospital that night from a combination of severe head trauma, internal bleeding, and various fractures.

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How do you stop a rhino from charging? Try not to antagonise it.

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What stinks and comes out of someones mouth. Bad Breath

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What did the rap singer say to the other rap singer? "You just got served. Here, read this subpoena and sign it, verifying your understanding of the document."

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How do you confuse a blonde? Say eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

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What did little Jimmy say when he met God ? Nothing, God doesn't exist.

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JFK

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if a dinosaurs could talk, what would they say nothing their all dead

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What do you call it when a black guy runs down a hill? A male of African descent sprinting down a geographical landform that extends above the surrounding terrain.

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How many Puerto Ricans does it take to clog the treads of my tank? Eight

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I used to be an adventurer like you... then I enlisted for much safer guard service with a more steady salary.

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A kid walked in to a bar, grabbed a napkin, and left

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A seal walks into a club.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had to arms. Knock knock Who's there? Well clearly not Sally

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Theres a black a guy and a mexican in a car, whos driving? The black guy, they are best friends and happen to both be neurosurgeons.

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Why did Jim fall out of the tree? Because Jim is a leaf.

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whats red that looks like ketchup taste like ketchup and is't tomato sorce? ketchup

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what did the black guy say to the other black guy? good morning

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you ever put a vibrating phone on your b a l l s ???

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"Behold, the greatest invention Man has ever seen!" exclaimed the inventor of eyes.

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What is the favorite song of Lady Di? no, that is a dead person and must be respected.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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