Why is Justin Bieber gay? He prefers the companionship of homosexual relationship to that of a heterosexual one.

Whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? You eat a pizza.

How do you kill a polar bear? You melt the polar ice caps and take a rope and choke it till it is out cold. You then put a plastic bag over its head and throw it in the water.

If a tree falls, and nobody is around to hear it, does it still make a sound? No. While the falling tree surely creates mechanical oscillations in the air, sound is defined as the mechanical oscillations in the air perceived by humans. Therefore, since no humans were around to hear the tree fall, it did not create a sound.

I helped build the town school. But when people see me, no one says "Hey, there's the guy that built the town school." I helped put out the flames, when the city was on fire. But when people see me they don't say "Hey, there's the hero that saved the city." But I have sex with one goat.... And people judge me justifiably asd having sex with goats is really disgusting and sticks in peoples minds.

Q: Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A: One stops sucking when you slap it.

A baby crawls into an abortion clinic.

Tom buys his wife Mary the latest Eco friendly car. The car is said to get well over 100 miles on a tank of gas. A week later, Tom is stunned to learn that while Mary was driving to the supermarket the car ran out of gas. The tank was full and Mary only drove 5 miles. How is this possible? Mary was involved in a horrible car accident. The gas tank immediately emptied and set fire to Mary and her baby.

A woman walks out of the kitchen, she gets slapped by her sexist husband.

why couldn't the boy eat his oreo's? His sister ate it.

Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

Yo mama is so ugly, she entered an ugly contest and placed well in her division.

how can you tell if your moms fat? if Dora can't explore her (mx)

What's worse then 10 babies nailed to one tree? Nailed to 10 trees

how do you kill a blonde? shoot her in the face with a pistol

Knock Knock! Who's there? Ze Gestapo!

What job function does a blonde have in an M&M factory? Quality control or some other function.

Never-mind that, you've got AIDS.

religion.

Why did the rabbit fall out of the tree? because it was dead Why did the bird fall out of the tree? because it was stapled to the rabbit

Justin Bieber walks into a bar. <>

Why did the chicken cross the road. Because, It can't fly

A black man and a mexican are in a car. Whos driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken off from their law firm. Alex had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. Rain had come upon them and an off-duty police officer picked them up and took them to a nearby hotel. The three men had drinks and the friends had a wonderful time. But Alex never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months later John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

what did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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