- Mom, you've got a banana in your ear. - Son I can't hear you I've got a banana in my ear!

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HaHaHaHa... Was the last joke funny? Ya, well this ones not.

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Know what's worse than three bee stings? living every day in fear of your schizophrenic hallucinations

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When life gives you aids, make aids-aid.

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^that joke a piece of shit

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What is worse than finding a worm in an apple? The Holocaust

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What did the monkey say to the owner of the world's rarest stamp? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

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A woman walks out of the kitchen, she gets slapped by her sexist husband.

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Why did the boy lose his watch? Who cares? It was a shitty-ass watch.

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Why did the man fall down? He got shot

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knock knock whos there jew jew who JEW YOU

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Q: Why was the bacteria afraid of the sanitizer? A: Because hand sanitizers are made up of ethyl alcohol, inactive additives such as water, other alcohols and fragrances. Ethyl alcohol is the active ingredient in hand sanitizer and is designed to kill germs.

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What happened when john pelted susie with a rock? she had a temporary concusion, needed eight stitches and John was grounded

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When life gives you lemons, find someone with a papercut.

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Guess what my grandma told me yesterday.. Nothing she's dead.

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how do kill a black guy? shoot him in the face

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There was a man on a park bench and he saw a duck fly by so he decided to go and see what it was up to. He saw that it was just going for a swim in a near by pond. He died 2 years ago of auto erotic asphyxiation because of a common fetish.

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Roses are red Violets are blue i got one question Screw You

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Why couldn't Jimmy drive the tractor? Because he didn't have any arms or legs. Why didn't he have any arms or legs? Because Jimmy was a Potato.

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Why didn't the Mexican dwarf eat his taco? Well, he actually started, but he had already had one earlier. So, he gave half to his friend who gladly accepted the free taco.

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A duck sits down at a bar and orders a drink. After he finishes, he gets up to leave, when the bartender says, "Excuse me, sir, but you didn't pay for your drink." The duck turned around and said, "I'm sorry, I forgot." So he paid the bartender for the drink and left him a nice tip, and left the bar in a good mood.

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What do you call a black person at a 7-11? A customer.

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Why did the toast land butter side down. The devil visited earth that day and therefore everything that could go wrong did.

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What do you call a tall Asian Tall

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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