Why did the pineapple cry? It didn't, because it's a pineapple.

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so there are 3 people who have heard of this magical cliff; theyre names are harry, dick, and joe. how the cliff works is that when you jump off you turn into whatever you say as you jump. first harry jumps off and yells plane, he turns into a plane and flys off. next dick jumps off and yells bird he turns into a bird and flys off. finally joe steps up to the cliff as he was walking he trips and falls as hes falling he yells HARRY DICK he than hits the ground and dies. everyone mourned for such a well respected individual.

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What did the psychopath say to the firefighter? Can you lend me a few bucks? My clothes are dirty and I need to go to the launromat.

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Why was the man sitting down? He was recently paralyzed in a car accident.

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What do you call a man who laughed at a joke that wasn't funny? A man who gets amused at the littlest things.

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Knock knock. Who's there? The mailman. I don't believe you.

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A creationist, an evolutionist, and Neanderthal Man walk into a bar. They order two beers and a glass of red wine. The bartender asks: "Will that be all?". The evolutionist says "Yes"

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse says, "I have cancer."

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Why was the boy crying. He just got raped by a llama

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know.

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How do you blind a Chinese man You put a blind fold on him

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How many black people does it take to change a lightbulb? The same amount as white people, stop being racist.

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Q: Whats the difference between a watermelon and a infants head? A: One is fun to beat a with a hammer, and the other is the infants head.

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Knock Knock Who's There?? Its the police your family have died in a tragic road accident

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why did the plane crash the pilot was Suicidal

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what happens when a girl poops? she wipes her butt.

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What's the difference between erotica and kink? Erotica involves simple arousal; kink usually has an added element of masochism.

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What did the man say when he lost his keys? "Where's my keys?!"

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What do you have if you have a green ball in your right hand and a green ball in your left hand? Two green balls.

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Justin Bieber is having sex with a girl. He then awakes from this horrible nightmare.

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Why could the woman not play the game monopoly? Because she did not own the game monopoly

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I just flew in from New York and boy are my arms tired. I was jerking off during the entire plane ride.

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Do the Helen Keller... become mute, deaf, and blind.

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What is the saddest episode on tv ever? The live broadcast of the World Trade Center being destroyed.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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