Why did George ride his bike to the park? Due to the down economy his parents were forced to sell his bike in order to pay their bills.

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why did the giraffe cross the road? because my dad and his "fishing buddies" are having another "meeting" in the basement. I hear weird noises, and I haven't seen my little sister in weeks, since the last "meeting." Dad said she went to a special camp for little girls. I hear horrible noises.

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What's worse than the unwarrented death of six milliion Jews? The death of six million and one Jews

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Four blonds are driving to Disneyworld. They finally get to Florida and they see a sign that says "Disneyworld: left" so they turned around and went home

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An old bear-wrestler dies and finds himself at the pearly gates. Confused and at a loss for words due to the unfamiliar circumstance and lack of public toilets, he blurts out "Saint Peter, I presume?" but it was just the train conductor. "Ticket please." He searched his pockets and finally found the ticket. He wished he had a dog, but not a seeing-eye dog because people would assume he was blind. This story illustrates the importance of situational awareness, remembering which pocket you put your ticket in, and not forgetting to go before you leave because you don't know when you'll be able to find a restroom.

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How do you confuse a blond? Begin talking to her about a subject that's not in her field of expertise using complicated technical verbiage and jargon.

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Where can you find a Muslim with a boxcutter? At a UPS.

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Drunk irish man

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? She's dead.

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If I have 10 ice cubes and you have 11 apples how many pankackes can fit on the roof? Purple because alians do not wear hats./

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CHICKEN it is a chickenly chickeny food we eat WRONG

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Jameson: hey peter peter parker: what Jameson: do you know what my favorite kind of beans are Peter: no Jameson: van de camps

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mat: whats 2+2? emma: how long we lasted

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What happen to Teenage Mutain ninja turtals? Go Ninja Go.

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What did the Jew say to the other Jew? Found a penny the other day....

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Your mother is so ugly that people make yo mamma jokes about her

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eloise dey.

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how many moms can you fit in a bathtub? as many as you want

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how do you keep a blonde busy for 7 to 8 hours. you give her m&m's and tell her to spell a word.

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What happens when you yell at people who have high blood pressure? They might get heart attacks & die.

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Gays

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Person 1: Knock knock Person 2: Who is there??? Person 1: ..................................... Person 2: (Opens Door) Person 1: BOO i scared u and ding dong ditched u Person 2: Actually "Ding Dong Ditching" is when a one or more human beings search for a targeted house where they ring the door bell and run to a designated location to hide. After the resident opens the door to find out no one has stayed and waited, they close the door and the human beings quickly run up and repeat the task many as times until the resident finally catches them.

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Roses are red, That much is true, but Violet are purple, not ****ing blue

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a man texted his wife saying "hey sexy, how was your day?(;" unfortunately, she never replied because she got in a cr accident and died from texting while driving.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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