What happened to the man who dropped his soap? Nothing he picked it up and lived a happy life.

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Knock Knock Whose there. Mike Mike seriously I told you to stop coming here or ill call the police But I just wanted to talk to you Ok thats it im calling the police

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what did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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What's red, white, and black all over? A panda shot and killed by a poacher.

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69

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding 2 worms in your apple.

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What do you call a black man with cancer? A very unfourtunate man.

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Your mother is so fat that she has diabetes

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What did the Vampire say to the pastor? Nothing. You have to be real to talk

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Kendall and Nick Fredick

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What do you get when you cross a fan with a child? A mess that you now have to clean up.

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Your mother is so fat. But I'm fine with it.

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When Life gives you lemons, Make Orange Juice!

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What did the blind lawyer say to the doctor? We're both lawyers!

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Q: How many 3 go into the number 102,351? A: Yes.

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Whats something really annoying? A guy who presses enter too much. hehe

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A blind man sits down to read Anti jokes Whoops my bad

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Yo mamma so mexican she brought tacos to the dinner table

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They decide to exchange heads. Barbie squeezes the small opening under her chin over Ken's bulging neck socket. His wide jaw line jostles atop his girlfriend's body, loosely, like one of those novelty dogs destined to gaze from the back windows of cars. The two dolls chase each other around the orange Country Camper unsure what they'll do when they're within touching distance. Ken wants to feel Barbie's toes between his lips, take off one of her legs and force his whole arm inside her. With only the vaguest suggestion of genitals, all the alluring qualities they possess as fashion dolls, up until now, have done neither of them much good. But suddenly Barbie is excited looking at her own body under the weight of Ken's face. He is part circus freak, part thwarted hermaphrodite. And she is imagining she is somebody else—maybe somebody middle class and ordinary, maybe another teenage model being caught in a scandal. The night had begun with Barbie getting angry at finding Ken's blow up doll, folded and stuffed under the couch. He was defensive and ashamed, especially about not having the breath to inflate her. But after a round of pretend-tears, Barbie and Ken vowed to try to make their relationship work. With their good memories as sustaining as good food, they listened to late-night radio talk shows, one featuring Doctor Ruth. When all else fails, just hold each other, the small sex therapist crooned. Barbie and Ken, on cue, groped in the dark, their interchangeable skin glowing, the color of Band-Aids. Then, they let themselves go— Soon Barbie was begging Ken to try on her spandex miniskirt. She showed him how to pivot as though he was on a runway. Ken begged to tie Barbie onto his yellow surfboard and spin her on the kitchen table until she grew dizzy. Anything, anything, they both said to the other's requests, their mirrored desires bubbling from the most unlikely places.

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What did the priest say to the kid? You can tell your dog but nobody else, ok?

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Would you like a better house, car, spouse, and a better life all together? No, no thanks.

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24

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what's the difference between a white man and a black man? their skin color

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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