Why did the girl drop her ice cream her cone broke

Patients: Whats happening doctor Doctor: I am afraid you all have tested positive Patients: Oh No!!! Doctor: Positive for being great friends all these years! Patients: Oh Doctor you are so.... Doctor: ASWELL AS AIDS!!!

Q: who's Snow White's brother A: egg white Get the yolk!

A man walks into a bar and takes his seat. After a minute, someone shouts "133!" and this is followed by a couple of slight chuckles around the room. Later, "57!" is heard from the corner, followed by harsh laughter. After a while, someone shouts "66!" which is met by an uproar of uncontrollable laughter. The man, confused by the evening's events, asks the barmam what is going on. The barman explains, every joke has been told countless times so instead of reciting them, they are numbered and people call out the numbers. The man catches on to this, and therefore shouts "453!" which is followed by a deadly silence, because no one had heard that particular joke before, so 453 was just a number to them.

What's megan fox's bra size? Wait I got a fb notification brb!

Im So Hood... That When I go Shopping, I Buy Sweatshirts with Hoods

here is Stevie Wonder's poem: sjkgfhdujduehfheuefeufhhf uefuefg eufbejfbefehfehutuge' wiohl;wreohqweiothurelwueths sjtghekltrhlsdifhlziurhlsiurhtwoli

What's Donald Trump's favorite color?

mat: whats 2+2? emma: how long we lasted

Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Some guy stapled it to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? A terrorist threw a refrigerator at it. Why did the girl fall off her bike? She was hit by 3 dead monkeys and a refrigerator.

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What did the apple say to the apple? Nothing, they're apples.

A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. The bartender asks the rabbi "why the long face?" The rabbi says "to get to the other side." Seeing the puzzled look on the bartender's face, the priest says, "orange you glad he didn't say banana?"

Why does Santa Claus not have children? Because he only comes once a year.

What do you get when you cross a zebra and a panda? Well, pandas are almost extinct. I guess they gave up and started goin' with zebras.

man was playing with his little toddler. the man put his thumb through his fingers and said "got your nose" the baby laughed. the cops then burst down his door and arrested him for robbery of personal items. they werent laughing.

What did Helen Keller's parents do when they were displeased with her behavior? They beat the shit out of her.

A Guy walks into a Bar, has a good time and leaves

Have you heard that Hitler and Osama Bin Laden share a room with saton in hell

What did the dad do immediately do after his child died? Cleaned off the knife.

Why did George ride his bike to the park? Due to the down economy his parents were forced to sell his bike in order to pay their bills.

What starts with "F" and ends with "uck"? F*ck

Why did the asian fall over? He had a heart attack.

Sticks and stones can break my bones And words can make me lonely

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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