Helen got hit by a bus. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Helen!!

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot had a seizure.

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A man buys a kitten from the store. He gets home, takes it out of its cage, and realizes that it wasn't the kitten he wanted. He then returns to the store and exchanges for the kitten he originally wanted, but then decides to keep both because he is feeling particularly hungry.

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Why was the boy crying? Because his parents were in a car crash and died and his grandparents were already dead and he got cancer for christmas. And he had no testicles

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Q. What do you call a small hen that can't lay eggs properly? A. A small hen that can't lay eggs properly.

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There are two gingerbread men in an oven and the one says " it's hot in here" the other says "holy crap it's a talking cookie!!!!!!!!"

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where are you?

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what ya call e dong withb eyes peeneyes

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what do you call a newborn baby? anything you want.

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What do you call a black guy who sells drugs? a pharmacist

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A man walks into a bar. Q: What's the apple doing on your head? A: Peach? It's not pear. It's banana.

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Why was the boy embarrassed when he opened his parents' bedroom door? Because he had been trying the door for several minutes until he realized he was pushing instead of pulling.

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Kenny died. The Bastards.

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what's funnier than 3 dead babies in a trashcan pretty much anything thats not funny

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What do u call a black rapper who only raps about sex and money? lil wayne

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why did the bear fall out of the tree? the bear got shot

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A Jew and a German walk in a bar. they've accepted their peoples past and learned to move on with their lives

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What is the difference between a black guy and a road? One you put tar on and the other one is a road

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How do you tell if there is an elephant in your refrigerator? Check for footprints in the butter.

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Why didn't the man cross the road? He was paralyzed.

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Q. why was Martin Luther King assassinated? A. he wasn't his son was

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Yo mamma is so fat she needs a highly dangerous gastrointestinal bypass and if she dies you will wish she had made more of an effort to diet.

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A doctor, a farmer, and a blonde walk into a bar. The doctor orders red wine because he knows it's good for the heart. The farmer orders a Piña Colada because he likes fruit. The two men wait eagerly to what the blonde is about to order. The blonde opens her purse and says "Damn it, I can't find my credit card." Suddenly, a handsome young gentleman walks up to her says "Don't worry miss, I'll buy a drink for you. What are you having?" The blonde looks up and says "Don't worry? I just lost my credit card!" In a fit a of anger, the blonde storms out the bar and doesn't order anything.

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Q: What is black, white, and red all over? A: A nun in a blender.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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