Your mom is such a slut she had sex with your dad on the very first night of their marriage!

A man walks into a doctors office. The doctor says "I've got good news and bad news. Which do you want first?" The man responds "Let's hear the good news." The doctor says "I ran a series of tests and found you have leukemia, but your insurance paid for everything." Shocked, the man asks "What's the bad news?" The doctor answers "Your company is switching to a private insurer and because of your pre-existing condition you've been denied coverage. None of your future treatments will be covered."

-What did the snake say to the mouse? Nothing. Animals can't talk dumbass.

Whats green and has 4 wheels? A green car.

Why was the black man scared to leave his house? Because he saw a load of mutated zombies outside his door trying to kill him. However, he realised that this was not possible and was not scared anymore. He went outside but got hit by a fridge and died...

what do you call a black guy fixing your electricity an electrician

69

What's worse than finding half a sticker in your apple Half a worm

Two rabbis standing at the buffet cart. The first exclaims "Oy vey, those pork chops look good!". The second shrugs, turns to his friend and remarks, "So do your wife's norks".

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have a gun, Get in the car.

Bob goes swimming in the ocean. Due to the fact that his father sexually abused him as a child, and never taught him how to swim, he drowns.

Why are black people so tall ? Genetics. duh.

What is the difference between a duck? It can neither ride a bike.

Whats gayer than driving a prius Buttsex

What's a zombie's favourite dessert? I don't know, but I'll give you 50 bucks to go and ask one.

How are a grape and a duck alike? They're both purple... except for the duck.

I have a black guy in my family tree? Yea, his still hanging their

Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? People cross roads all the time, each for their own personal reasons. Questioning their motives is generally accepted as being unnecessary, as it is a relatively safe action as log as one is careful and heeds the laws of traffic.

Why couldn't the kid get into the pirate movie? Tickets were sold out.

what did one picture frame say to the other? Well you could answer with hows it hanging but thats not logical because they are inanimate

I can't remember if I have Azheimer's or not.

Q: What did Gaddafi get for Christmas? A: Brain Surgery

What happened when a boy used the wrong punctuation and grammar, plus forgot how to spell the word know? i dont ;now!!!!!!!!!

this guy didnt get any pussy last night so go easy on him I I I V

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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