What did the left nut say to the right nut? Nothing

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How do you murder a blonde? You drop a bull dozer on her filled with 2 bulls, 100 wasps and a rabbit squirrel.

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Michael Hoffman leaves the gym

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womens rights

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What is funny about 9/11. Nothing, it was a tragic day for the world.

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Knock Knock .....................Oh it was just the TV

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What do you get when you cross a third edition X-19 TQRFT scooter with a teal-colored pencil? A third edition X-19 TQRFT scooter with a teal-colored pencil on it.

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if life gives you lemons you probably have problems

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How do you save someones life? Do not kill them.

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why am i on this site? cause its funny

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Get your coat, I've got a knife.

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"One fish, two fish, red fish, the holocost." -Dr. Seuss

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What the difference between water and water? Nothing, they're both water.

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John: Hey Bill, ORANGE you in the mood to go to a Phillies game? Bill: Yes! So let's make like a banana and raise our potassium levels drastically and leave right away to beat the rush hour traffic.

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Yo mama is so fat, she had to get liposuction.

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tänk om jag inte vill läga upp en ny

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Why did the black guy only turn left? Because he was mentally retarded and couldn't tell left from right and had no idea where he was going

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What's the difference between Michael Jackson and chess? Michael Jackson's dead.

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A Mexican and a black guy are in a car. Who's driving? The Mexican.

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A boy asks his father how babies are made. The father responds, "Babies are created via coital sex. A man rhythmically inserts his erect penis into a woman's vagina until he ejaculates. If his semen successfully fertilizes her egg, a baby will slowly grow in her uterus. After roughly forty weeks of gestation, the baby will be born."

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There's two men on a subway. One says "Hey, that's my sandwich.".

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Why didn't Timothy wish his dad a Happy Father's Day? His dad died yesterday in a car accident.

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Yeah its just my way of saying that I appreciate you worrying so much about me, you are a sweet girl, Honestly I do not understand why the hell you guys are using Horsehead AntiJoke out of all places, there are far more terrible forgettable sites available, I mean this sites connection suddenly went from disgustingly terrible to fine and dandy, the Feds, the Interpol and even fucking Al Qaeda might be reading every single message, but there is no way in hell anyone can decipher the code format, if they could, they would have done it when I invented it sixteen years ago, Myself mind you, nothing subtle about me today apparently.

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Roses are yellow Violets are also yellow Please don't stereotype again

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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