There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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What do you get when you cross a fan with a child? A mess that you now have to clean up.

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-What did the snake say to the mouse? Nothing. Animals can't talk dumbass.

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Roses Are red violets are blue I HAVE FIVE FINGERS THE MIDDLE IS FOR U

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Your mother is so fat. But I'm fine with it.

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What's black and blue and red all over? I don't know, that's why I was asking you.

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-Have you ever eaten Ethiopian food? -No -Niether have they

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What did the Vampire say to the pastor? Nothing. You have to be real to talk

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Q) 1+1=? A) 6.

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Whats the difference between football and basketball? Absolutely everything By darragh Hamilton

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roses are red, violets are blue, some poems rhyme, but this one doesn't.

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What's red and green and goes around and around? A frog in a blender

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Q: How many 3 go into the number 102,351? A: Yes.

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Q:Whats worse than a worm in apple? A:The Holocaust. Q: What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? A: Were both lawyers! :D Q: What happens when you throw a purple rock in to a green river? A: It splashes

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so a horse walks into a bar right, and he goes up to the bartender, and the bartender being a smartass says why the long face(get because hes a horse), and the horse says his wife is dying of lung cancer, child services are taking his kids away , and im addicted to crack and that is why i have a long face the bartender then gives him the next round for free and the the horse dies of alchohol poisoning

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Cavan keely's the type of guy who drives past hilltown screaming GET IT THE VAN!!

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Seriously tho, too much sex? I need to know dog.

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What time is the dentist appointment? Time for you to get a watch

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What is the difference between a dog being hit by a car and an Arab being hit by a car? There are skidmarks before the dog

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Dancing Potatoe!

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Your mother is so fat that she has diabetes

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Why was the toddler laying in the middle of the road? Because she was the victim of a hit and run...

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What do Bear Grylls drink under breakfast? Tea.

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why did the chicken cross the road to get to the other side

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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