Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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The man goes to the doctor after just losing his job because his company went under because of the econmic crisis. His house is being foreclosed because without the money from his job he can't afford to pay for his house. His girlfriend also just left him because of recent conflicts about money and she was looking forward to having a family and with him jobless it was just out of the question. Man:"Doctor I could really use some good news" Doctor:"You have aids"

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How do you stop a black guy from drowning? You take your foot off of his face

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What happened after Peter broke his toe? He went into cardiac arrest and died.

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Whats red and hurts when you bite into it? A brick.

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I killed someone today. :D

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There is a bird and a squirrel in a tree. Later, as a farmer walked past, the squirrel ate the bird.

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Why did Kelly never see Wass? cus she never looked in right places !!!

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What does ms colot like to eat? Pants

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How many licks does it take to got to the Tootsie Roll center of a Tootsie Pop? 357

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how do you kill a blonde? the way you would kill anyone, here are some examples gun knife noose or orange. wait wtf who kills someone with an orange

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Why do black guys have brown skin ? Because there born that way

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 had a gun.

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A man is lonely and calls a hooker. She goes to his house, pleasures him, and then demands 42 million dollars. The man shoots the whore and throws her body into a river.

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I know Mandarin, He's a good friend of mine

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"My foot is killing me" "no, actually it's that noose around your neck"

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Why couldn't the girl throw the baseball over the fence? She had no arms.

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How did the blonde get blood on her Ipad? A terrible paper cut.

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How do you keep children off your lawn? Molest them

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Moral Man Solid V: The Pain Phantom.

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whats worse than a dead baby? A pile of dead babies and their grieving mothers standing over them. thats what.

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Why did the depressed teenager die? Because he had cancer.

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Ted Haggard.

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Why wasn't the boy at his basketball game? - Because he, his twin brother, and pregnant mother all died in a fatal car accident involving a train on the way their.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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