1 Jew XD

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What do you call a black man in space? A space monkey.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why are white people not good at basketball? Because they aren't black.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

You know those people that learned the true name of God, as God asked kindly... ...Well you know God can be nice sometimes but he actually COMMANDED they keep his name secret forever? They became the first people known as Jehova`s witnesses... JEHOVAH<<< SECRET NAME ANYBODY? So much for keeping his secret name guys! They claim that only a few thousand humans will ascend to heaven, in other words all of the JEHOVA`s witnesses... All two billions of them or something... For keeping his name (Cough JEHOVAH) secret. SUCCESS!

thumb_up thumb_down -12

A panda bear walks into a bar. The bartender then alerts the zoo of the whereabouts of their missing panda.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

A man walks into a hospital with a panicked expression, and rushes to his doctor's office. "Doctor, I am in tremendous pain when I breath!" "Hmm, seems to be a lung problem, take one of these antibiotics twice a day." "Thank you so much!" "Oh yah! Your family was brutally killed in a sixteen car pile up."

thumb_up thumb_down -12

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "Why the long face?". The horse does not respond because it is a horse. It can neither speak nor understand English. It is confused by its surroundings and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What's long, hard, and wet? A difficult college exam that fell in a puddle of water

thumb_up thumb_down -12

How do you stop a car? Put on the Brake

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What did the joke writer with A.D.D say refrigerator

thumb_up thumb_down -14

First person: Knock, knock. Second person: Who's there? First person: You know. Second person: 'You know' who? First person: O.O LORD VOLDEMORT!

thumb_up thumb_down -14

A Rock accidentally fed a giraffe his fetuses conceived by a box of glue from Jewish Heritage that was made from marker sharpeners that fed paper to elephants while strumming a box of tissues to wipe up the mess from a box of chocolates Forest Gump feeds on your soul while a rock accidentally feeds a giraffe.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Q: Why did the prostitute have no arms? A: Because she was an amputee.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Q: What's better than ice cream? A: Two ice creams! Q: What's better than 2 ice creams? A: Still two ice creams!

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead......

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What do A Canary and a Groundhog have in common? Nothing, Groundhogs can fly, and Canaries can't dig.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

man was playing with his little toddler. the man put his thumb through his fingers and said "got your nose" the baby laughed. the cops then burst down his door and arrested him for robbery of personal items. they werent laughing.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

S: How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? P: They can chuck wood.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust. No, the Holocaust never happened, you're an idiot.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What's megan fox's bra size? Wait I got a fb notification brb!

thumb_up thumb_down -20

space is fun

thumb_up thumb_down -20

25

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why wasn't the rabbit elgible to vote? Because rabbits aren't human beings, and only humans are allowed to vote.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

A platypus walks into a bar, and was the only mammal in the building capable of laying an egg.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops