A man walks into a bar and utters profanity because he's hit his head on a protruding metal object that cannot move out of the way and has therefore made him look stupid because he neglected to walk around it.

What did the pacific ocean do to the Atlantic ocean? He waved.

What did Batman say to Robin before getting into the car? We're going to Dairy Queen.

Yo Mumma so dumb she has to climb over a glass wall to see whats on the other side.... Yo Mumma's so fat when she walked past the tv she made me miss 5 series... Yo Mumma's so fat when god said let there be light she had to move out of the road. That's nearly all that I have, but if u have one leave it in the comment

What's worse than breaking your leg? Finding out that your family has died due to an infection causing all of them to perish in horrible deaths

69

Allie said yesssssssss!

What's the difference between a black man and a white man? Melanin!

So a Jewish Family walks into a German Pizzeria. They were very satisfied with the service and ended up tipping the waiter 20%

What do you call a mexican running out of a bank? A man running late to pick up his kids.

What did the muffin say to the other? This isn't logical

A dyslexic Irishman walks out of a bra.

LIE

Why do you almost never hear Americans complain about doing their laundry? Because they have a washing machine and they realize the majority of people in developing nations do their laundry by hand, using a wash board.

Why was young Timmy crying? Unfortunately he had a very rare but serious heart condition and he would probably die within a week.

Why didn't the blonde have friends? She couldn't find them at the store.

What do you call a gay Jew? I don't know, but Jews are cool.

Q: What do you call a cow with no legs? A: Evolutionarily destined to be eaten by a predator such as a wolf or coyote, barring haing a defense mechanism that allows it to fend off such attacks.

Your computer runs so slow that I had to run a virus scan.

Why did the young man visit the optometrist? Because when he went to put in his contacts earlier that morning, he dropped one on the carpet and couldn't find it and it was his last pair so he needed to go order new ones but it had been over a year since he had been to the optometrist so they make you come get your eyes checked before you make a new order to decide whether the lens strength should remain the same or be increased/decreased.

Q: What's worse than death? A: Nothing.

why didnt anyone like matt adams? cuz hes a stupid buttface

How Long Is A Chinaman's Name

What do you call a black guy with a gun? A soldier.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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