Your mom is so fat that she saw a school bus full of white children and , thought "I can hardly even remember a time when my body used to be slim." She now keeps track of her diet and exercises regularly,the result of this has been a weight loss of over 95 pounds.

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Trashcan!

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3 dogs, a blue dog, a yellow dog, and a red dog. The owner was a man named Jeff. Now the blue dog was always sad so Jeff named him blue. The yellow dog was always scared so Jeff named him yellow. Now the red dog he was red because he had red fur, so Jeff named him red. One day when Jeff was reading his newspaper, he accidentally hit his coffee and it fell on the floor. Question: What did Jeff do? I don't know.

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Roses are red, violets are blue and the sun is very hot

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What's invisible and smells like carrots? Rabbit farts. What's invisible and smells like rabbit farts? Carrots, if you're blind.

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a man walks into horse bar

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what happens when a jew meets a black person answer: they greet one another

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I have no ideas.

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U ALL LIAK DIK

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Want to hear a dead baby joke? Abortion

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Child Protection Services. ...............

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What call a duck with no wings? A deformity.

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what is the difference between babies and trampolines? you take your shoes off when jumping on a trampoline

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Asians are a lot like spongebob They're terrible at driving and good at karate.

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A Black man a Chinese man and a Jew walk in to a bar. Black man: nice place they got here Asian man: yeah I remember when it used to be that old hardware store Jew: Henry's, i think it was called Aisian man: must have been there for at least 10 years or so

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Whats more crazy? Stabbing someone or killing someone? I don't know thats why I am asking you

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If yesterday was friday, today is saturday, what day is it tomorrow? sunday

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a car drives off a cliff whos driving? an asin woman!

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What do you call your fist? Trying to talk to an appendage would indicate that you suffer from mental issues stemming from dysentery or lack of oxygen, and as a medical professional, I would recommend seeing a specialist.

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I don't always drink beer, but when I do, I beat my family.

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my namew is jd

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Q.If you are European in the bathroom, what are you in the kitchen? A. A woman.

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What's the difference between a watermelon and a baby? One is fun to hit with a bat and the others a watermelon

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Roses are red Violets are red Tulips are red Bushes are red Trees are red HOLY SHIT MY GARDEN's ON FIRE!!!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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