hey what are you eating there? a giant scorpion that tried to rape me.

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you wanna know hellen kellers favorite game? Marco Polo!

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What did the little girl do with her puppy? She killed it.

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women's rights

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what happend when the car hit the wall? it exploded and 4 people were injured, 2 were bystanders

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he had just been brutally raped by a lawnmower. The lawnmower had been hit by a car. The woman driving the car was suffering from Alzheimers disease. Which then escalated from the stress of the accident that she took her cat and ripped his right ass cheek then continued on with her day

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What do you call putting a vehicle on the side of the road? Parking.

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What do you call a fat man that can turn slim REALLY fast? Drew Carey

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How do you kill a fashion icon? First make sure their blonde and stupid like most. then take a barstool preferably or what ever is closest then........ WACK HER IN THE EMPTY SPOT WHERE HER BRAIN SHOULD BE.

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So a female ant walks into a bar... and someone steps on it.

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Knock knock Who's there? Death. Come with me.

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a gay guy walks into a bar what does he do? buys a drink after a hard day at work

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Q: Why is the earth round? A: I am Batman.

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Q. Why did the Mexican have to go back to Mexico? A. His mom died in an auto accident and no one in her village could afford to organize a proper funeral.

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Four rats are smoking in an alley. One rat turns to another and comments, "These are some fine smokes. Where'd ya score these?" The rat holding the pack of Menthols replies, "Off a' Fred." He points to a rotting whale carcass in the road. The other rats are horrified. "How did a whale die in the street?!," they squeak. "He didn't. He died on the beach."

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The early bird gets the worm, but the angry bird gets the pig.

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This is a haiku I said this is a haiku You read a haiku

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How long will it take for a dog to paint a color wheel? I don't know.

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want to hear a bird joke? no well, this is hawkward

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Roses are red Violets are blue I can't rhyme coffee table.

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how did little johnny die? i killed him

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Q: What did Santa give the little boy for Christmas? A: Nothing, he's not real

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What the difference between a alien and you nothing

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Why doesn't business go well for pizzeria Vesuvio? Their chef has been dead since many years.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops