What's black and white and red all over? The newspaper classified section after a man has abandoned long, futile job hunt. He has crossed out all the potential jobs with red ink. He was laid off due to the downturn in the economy and will now have to get food stamps, which is very embarrassing for a man who has worked to support his family his entire life.

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Okay, then I am taking the last comment back then.

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Why did the little boy and the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because they were dead.

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Anything Dane Cook says

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A dyslexic Irishman walks out of a bra.

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How many aborigines does it take to change a lightbulb? None. They have no idea what electricity is.

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Q: What do you call a fly with no wings. A: Dying.

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What did the latino say when he was struck over the head with a shovel? "ouch"

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what is light brown and looks like sand? sand

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How full could a skeleton's stomach possibly be? Replete with perceptible emptiness.

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126

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Why did the little girl cry when the x-ray showed her mom had a tumor? It was benign.

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Yo Mumma so dumb she has to climb over a glass wall to see whats on the other side.... Yo Mumma's so fat when she walked past the tv she made me miss 5 series... Yo Mumma's so fat when god said let there be light she had to move out of the road. That's nearly all that I have, but if u have one leave it in the comment

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Q: What was so funny about the death of Michael Jackson? A: There wasn't anything funny. He was one of the best pop stars ever and many people loved him.

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Why did they name the cat Salty? I have no idea, ask his owner

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what do you call a dead baby in a blender? -taken care of. by: Calee^_^•

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Why didn't the blonde have friends? She couldn't find them at the store.

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Q: What do you call a cow with no legs? A: Evolutionarily destined to be eaten by a predator such as a wolf or coyote, barring haing a defense mechanism that allows it to fend off such attacks.

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Your computer runs so slow that I had to run a virus scan.

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What did Brielle say when she fell off the swing? Ow.

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Allie said yesssssssss!

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A batch of muffins is cooking in the oven, one muffin says to the others "it's hot in here!" the other muffins don't respond because they're muffins. He's the only of his kind.

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On a scale of Voldemort to Nigel Thornberry, how large is your nose?

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The term "serial killer" is a bit strong...i prefer "ghost manufacturer"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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