Two computers walk into a bar I forget the rest

thumb_up thumb_down +41

The term "serial killer" is a bit strong...i prefer "ghost manufacturer"

thumb_up thumb_down +37

how do you make a baby cry? throw bricks at his face.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why do you almost never hear Americans complain about doing their laundry? Because they have a washing machine and they realize the majority of people in developing nations do their laundry by hand, using a wash board.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Knock Knock Whos there? Me Me who? Oh sorry forgot you had alzheimers :/

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What's the difference between a black man and a white man? Melanin!

thumb_up thumb_down -47

KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? all my friends break the door down...oh alright then ill answer i guess WHO IS IT? THE REAPER oh s*** dude! [panic face] NO ONES HOME? "In other news tonight, 2 local men found murdered in their living rooms, after looking up common joke style called antee joke. Police say the door was smashed in an obvious sign of forced entry. They seem to have just mysteriously had sudden heart attacks and fainted. heh heh...hey nancy....why did the chicken cross the road? [=< heh heh" "y" "because he thouroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic" "HAHAHAHAHAHAHA *GASP!* X.x dead face "NANCY! NANCY!.....well in other OTHER news ive just murdered nancy, and thats no joke." *runs*

thumb_up thumb_down -47

What's the difference between a Pogo-stick and a Unicorn. A lot actually.

thumb_up thumb_down +158

What did the pacific ocean do to the Atlantic ocean? He waved.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Knock knock who's there? A serial rapist, now open up. hmmm... Ok... 3 Days passed before they found the serial rapist dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Why did the black man buy a gun?? He enjoys hunting legally

thumb_up thumb_down +16

whats bright and yellow? the sun.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

N

thumb_up thumb_down +6

what kind of animals marriage is high? snails because It has home and car.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

patient: Doctor, It hurts when I go like this. doctor: Don't do that.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

why didnt anyone like matt adams? cuz hes a stupid buttface

thumb_up thumb_down -38

How many Jews can you fit in a Volkswagon? 5 comfortably

thumb_up thumb_down +115

For anti-joke.com, there should be a section called "Hot" that shows new jokes which are given 5 thumbs up or up. This way we would get new jokes on the popular section instead of having the same ones for a very long time. I know this isn't a joke, but thumbs up if you agree.

thumb_up thumb_down +101

Q: What's worse than death? A: Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What is the worst part about being a black Jew? Having to sit at the back of the gas chamber.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why didn't the lobster share his treasure? Because he did not possess the cranial capacity to understand the concept of ownership; thus, he did not consider the treasure his

thumb_up thumb_down +116

Why did the man float in the lake? Because he was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +76

What has five letters and sounds like "trucks?" Vroom

thumb_up thumb_down +58

Q: Why did the plane crash? A: Because the pilot was a loaf of bread

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops