Siblings are like sharks, they usually stop biting you when you stab them in the eyes

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What did the blind man do in the dark room? Nothing, he couldn't see.

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What's ur favorite color? Cancer Made by mark

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What do Michael Jackson and Whitney Houston have in common? They were both great singers.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead

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What is the difference between an Irishman and a plank of wood? Almost everything, including anatomy, chemical make up, mass etc

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Your mom is such a slut, she had unprotected sex at least once.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She didnt have arms

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How many Mexicans does it take to change a lightbulb 500 , 1 to hold the lightbulb, 499 to spin the house

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If a tree falls, and nobody is around to hear it, does it still make a sound? No. While the falling tree surely creates mechanical oscillations in the air, sound is defined as the mechanical oscillations in the air perceived by humans. Therefore, since no humans were around to hear the tree fall, it did not create a sound.

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why did the feminist cross the road? To suck my D***

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um...... What's worse than 15 babies stapled to trees? sixteen babies staples to trees PS: I will stop posting if 3 people don't like this by tommarow.

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How many mice does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two.

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Ay Bee Cee Dee Ey Ef Gee Haych Eye Jay Kay El Em En Ow Pee Queue Our Es Tee You Vee Doubleyou Ex Why Zed Now you know your ABC, come along and sing with me!

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Q: What did the latino kid get for christmas? A; Nothing because he died two days before

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven had a serious alcohol problem that gave him violent tendencies.

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Why did the frog fall out the tree it was dead. Why did the second frog fall out the tree it was stapled to the first frog. Why did the third frog fall from to the tree peer pressure. Why did the fourth frog fall from the tree the third frog was his son. Why did the fifth frog fall from the tree he thought it was a game. Why did the sixth frog fall from the tree he shared the same body with the fifth frog

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what do you call a boomerang that never comes back? stick

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whats faster than the speed of light? a jew with a coupon

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I got a dig bick. You that read wrong, You read that wrong too.

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What do you call someone who can't lose? Charlie Sheen

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Yo mamas so fat.

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No, but it was a nice chance to pretend to, that was the scheme part I might have mentioned, people never figure out that you are fucking them over at the present, if you tell them you fucked them off in the past, they start thinking backwards, often ignoring those tiny details straight in front of them. Listen, call me a bit paranoid, but who the hell is Septimus and AzureDragon or whatever the fuck his little geek name was?

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Write Your Own It's easy to take part, just type your text below!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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