Knock knock who's there? A serial rapist, now open up. hmmm... Ok... 3 Days passed before they found the serial rapist dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What do you get when you mix Fruit and Flys? Fries... or Flutes, depending on how many Flys your add.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

A Man walks into a bar, he sits down on a stool and begins to cry. Why are you crying, asks the Bartender. I just lost my job, my wife left me and I had my car reposesed. Ok says the Bartender, I know what'll cheer you up, he promptly pulls out a 12 inch piano and begins to play. The Man at the Bar says, hey thats awesome where did you get it? The Bartender says, a really old Genie gave it to me. You know what, I like you so I am going to let you have my last wish. Really? Asks the man, Ok thanks, I wish for a million bucks said the man at the bar. There was a Loud voice saying "Your Wish has been granted" then the room was full of ducks. Hey! Exclaimed the man, I didn't wish for a million ducks, I wished for a million bucks! Yeah, said the bartender, and I wished for a 12 inch penis...

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A blonde, brunette, and a redhead walk into a bar. The redhead, growing tired of the constant ridicule directed at her from the other two, kills them. She pleads guilty to 3rd degree murder on two counts and is sentenced two life sentences in a maximum security prison in Cambodia.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

whats sixty-twelve and a half + one one sixty-twelve isn't a number

thumb_up thumb_down +34

What's yellow and smells like piss? Piss

thumb_up thumb_down +28

what do you call a dead baby in a blender? -taken care of. by: Calee^_^•

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Okay, then I am taking the last comment back then.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

patient: Doctor, It hurts when I go like this. doctor: Don't do that.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What did the brick say to the face? Nothing bricks don't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

What do you call a black guy with a gun? A soldier.

thumb_up thumb_down -46

A Weight loss service that works

thumb_up thumb_down -96

What's black and white and red all over A nun falling down the stairs

thumb_up thumb_down +13

69

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Someone said you sound like an owl Who?

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Dude, you're never going to guess how stupid my friend Philip is! Really? What did he do?? Nothing. Philip will be attending the prestigious Princeton University next year and is therefore an incredibly intelligent human-being. You're an idiot for believing me.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

How Long Is A Chinaman's Name

thumb_up thumb_down -43

A wise man once said, "Your life is your habits." So simple yet so true. My habits include: Breathing, having my heart beat, producing brain waves, and other regulatory bodily processes.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why can't orphans play baseball? They don't know where home is.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

KSI

thumb_up thumb_down -60

Yo momma is so fat... Her body mass is above average.

thumb_up thumb_down -66

Doorknob.?/111111!!!!hrfuasdyfgasdkhfgawihbrtpaeyrgfai;yegf;gtf L Like or I will killl you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -138

Knock knock. I HAVE A SHOTGUN

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Dear diary, its day 230, the apple supply's are running low, the doctors are closing in, the dentists have been chanting "its time to go to the dentist" all day, I wont be able to hold them back much longer, help.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops