When does George Harrison take a shit? In the morning

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Q: What do you call a dyslexic Irish man with no legs? A: Handicapped

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What do you get when you mix your mom and your dad? YOU!!!

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Why wasn't the boy at his basketball game? - Because he, his twin brother, and pregnant mother all died in a fatal car accident involving a train on the way their.

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A Frenchman an Italian and an American were setting in a bar drinking and talking. The Frenchman said he made love to his wife five times last night. She said if I died she would never get married again. The Italian said said he made love to his wife ten times last night and that she said if he ever died she would kill her self. They asked the American how many times he made love to his wife last night. He said I'm a widower. She died in the 9/11 attacks.

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What's the difference between me and a ghost? Ghosts aren't Dolphins!

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How do you kill a polar bear? You melt the polar ice caps and take a rope and choke it till it is out cold. You then put a plastic bag over its head and throw it in the water.

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How many Amish people does it take to change a light bulb? None because they don't believe in technology.

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knock knock who's there? rock rock who? rock on the ground, don't trip

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A man walks into a bar and says "ouch."

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What'd the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? Just Dance 2 the video game

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when geese fly in a V patteren why is on side longer than the other? not as many geese on that side

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I had a "What would jesus do bracelet" and some kid kicked me in the shin... As i was contemplating on what to do to him, i looked at the bracelet and remembered.... SO I SET HIM ON FIRE AND SENT HIM TO HELL!!!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To warn people on the other side that the sky was falling Why did the cow cross the road? Cause he had madcow disease Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? Cause he's Chuck Norris Why did the Mexican cross the road? He was on his way to America Why did the black man cross the road? He was just running to his car you racist.....after he had robbed the bank Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass

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Why did Jack explode? He had a sneezier and his army friend Stephan threw a grenade at him because he was scared.

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Once my grandpa said: Your generation relies too much on technology. Then I said: No. Your generation relies too much on technology. Then I unplugged his life support.?

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Why couldn't the duck get his driver's license? Well, it was a duck and as far as we're concerned they don't have thumbs or arms and are therefore incapable of driving.

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Q: Why didnt the dinosaurs cross the road? A: Because theyre all dead.

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How did Pikachu jump off of a 100 story building and survive? He's not real

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why?

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This is probably how President Obama proposed to his wife. "I don't wanna be Obama self"

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Q: When is the best date to walk out your door in New York? A: 9/11

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Unless you yourself put you trough that pain and misery, you have no reason to dislike or flee from who you are.

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Why did little Bobby put a firecracker in the dog's ass? Don't worry, he used lube.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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