a man walks into a bar....... thats it.

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Jesus was nailed to the cross by Roman guards... His disciples were kept behind a line of guards and they could not hear Jesus speak. They can see he was saying something, so they had to get closer to hear what he was saying. John dodged a guard and ran towards Jesus, but a guard cut his leg off with a sword... Peter ran for it and got past John but another guard cut off one of his legs... Matthew saw this opportunity to dodge both guards and jets past both John and Peter and gets to the foot of the cross... Jesus looks down at Matthew and says, "Matthew.... I can see your house from here!"

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3 men check in to a motel. They all decide to leave given the eminent danger of being the butt of a homosexual joke.

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WHat is worse then Fred singing and cumy condom

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Ring. Ring. Hello? Hey, It's Sean Oh hi! How are you?

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Why didn't Jimmy go to school? Because his school was nuked.

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A guy hit his elbow. Judaism.

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What is the difference between a dog being hit by a car and an Arab being hit by a car? There are skidmarks before the dog

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Knock,Knock Whos there ? Hola Holo who ? Holocaust Hahahaha

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Why didn't the girl put on her mascara? Because she was too poor to buy any.

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What's black and white and red all over? A penguin in a blender.

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Q: How many banana peels does it take to run down the street, true or false? A: Telephone poles don't have doors.

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The cow says MOO. Until you shoot it.

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Yo momma's so fat, she slipped into a diabetic coma.

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What do you call a prison inmate with no arms or legs? John. That's his name.

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Why did sally fall of the swing? SHE HAD NO ARMS!

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A seal walks into a club...and is taken in custody by animal control due to the club having a no animal policy.

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3 penguins meet each other in penguin #1's backyard for a pool party. The first penguin climbs up the steps of the water slide gets to the top, looks around and then slides down the slide *SPLASH* The second penguin climbs up the steps, looks around then slides down the slide *SPLASH* The third penguin hastily climbs the steps and slides down the slide radio -Soulbroker

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How do you catch a unique rabbit? You could probably find many of them in the vicinity of Chernobyl. The radiation has probably created thousands of mutations. They are probably not as fast as regular rabbits.

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John - hey do you have tickets to see Oasis? Sam - No I bought green day tickets intead. John rolls his eyes at sam very dissapointedly then proceeds to go home. The next day Sam phones John excitedly telling him he traded his Green day tickets for Oasis tickets, a smile appears on Johns and Sams faces, not that they can see each other, they both then put the phone down. An African died. Green Day are a bad band.

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Some guy stapled it to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? A terrorist threw a refrigerator at it. Why did the girl fall off her bike? She was hit by 3 dead monkeys and a refrigerator.

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What is 2+2? 4!

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What's the resemblance between a chicken? Its legs are approximately equal, especially the left one.

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What looks like a dick? A penis

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops