what's green and has wheels? grass, i lied about the wheels.

A man walks into a bar and orders a beer. But it wasn't as good as he had hoped it would be.

According to astronomy, when you wish upon a star, you're actually a few million years late. That star is dead. Just like your dreams.

Sorry boss

Q. Why Did The Blond Have The Biggest Boobs In The Third Grade? A. Because She's 21

What did the man say after falling off a bridge? He didn't say anything. He died a painful and terrible death on impact.

you will now laugh.

Why did the girl fall off the swings? Because she has no arms Why can't she get back up? Because she has no legs Why won't anyone help her up? Because she's a woman.

Roses are red Violets are blue Your ugly

Why couldn't little Sally talk? Someone stapled her tongue to wall.

Whats the difference between a Ferrari and 1,000 babies? The Ferrari is expensive and the babies are in a nice hospital.

What happened to the guy who ate an alarm clock at 6 o'clock in the morning? He nearly died, and was diagnosed with numerous dietary problems.

What happened to the alligator who waled into a bar? He was killed and skinned by swamp hunters in Louisiana.

What did the baby say to its mother after breastfeeding? Nothing

Yo' momma's so fat, she has an increased risk of cardiovascula disease and may die.

Q: How many Mexicans does it take to change a lightbulb? A: Juan

What's worse than a worm in your apple? Two worms in your apple.

Why did the Mexican guy run to the hospital? Because it was faster than walking.

A man walks into a bar. Q: What's the apple doing on your head? A: Peach? It's not pear. It's banana.

What's worse than finding your dad's wedding ring while fingering your sister ? 3 bee stings.

Why was the white guy eating himself? He was a autocannibal.

A white man walked in da hood aaand he never came back

Hey, Texas! Knock knock Texas: Who's there? Ebola

Why did Susie fall off the swing - because she had no arms Knock Knock Who is it Not Susie

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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