Dude, you're never going to guess how stupid my friend Philip is! Really? What did he do?? Nothing. Philip will be attending the prestigious Princeton University next year and is therefore an incredibly intelligent human-being. You're an idiot for believing me.

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What's the difference between a Pogo-stick and a Unicorn. A lot actually.

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what happened to the woman who was a prostitute? She was arrested because it is a crime

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If you have ten apples, and I take away three, then you will only have seven apples left, because ten minus three is seven. On the other hand, if I have a hundred apples, and you take away ninety-six, then I will call the police on you because that is stealing and it is not allowed.

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How did bob survive the explosion? He wasn't at the explosion.

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What did the moon say to the sun? "I am the moon."

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How do you make a clown cry? Kill his wife and kids.

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What did one black guy say to the other black guy? I haven't thought of it yet....

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What did the brick say to the face? Nothing bricks don't talk.

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How Long Is A Chinaman's Name

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Yo momma is so fat... Her body mass is above average.

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A guy walks into a bar. He's an alcoholic and it's destroying his family.

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After waking up at the break of dawn, a man saw his dogs food dish was empty. In slight excitement for his dog to finally eat after his dish being empty all night, he called his dog in from outside, expecting him to go straight to his food dish like always. The dog walked by without noticing.

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What do you get if you cross a black man with a knife? Stabbed.

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Knock knock. I HAVE A SHOTGUN

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Don't look! I'm naked! No, seriously! I'm naked!

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Why was young Timmy crying? Unfortunately he had a very rare but serious heart condition and he would probably die within a week.

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Wanna hear a joke? Good, go ask a comedian.

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Nero, its not that, people are leaving left and right, you where right when you told me that I was holding into the remains of a rotting corpse, the underground society is dead and money alone will never bring it back, but I got the funds and you the talent, is there nothing that can be achieved? You are a lawyer, you write novels, you live a family life, you work for who the hell knows what organization, is this what you traded your, or if I may say, our legacy for? I dont suspect you Nero, I am disappointed in you, part of me wishes you where a backstabber, rather than the one that just quit.

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what do you call a dead baby in a blender? -taken care of. by: Calee^_^•

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What's the difference between Skittles and black people? ...I like Skittles.

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i just want thumbs up so i feel better about myself.....

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a Chinese man an and a southern red neck walked into a country club and the chinese man got jumped and he left with no money

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Whats worse than breaking your toe? Being raped

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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