Why did Thomas miss school? Because he was sick

thumb_up thumb_down +19

guess what? What? you have to guess...your mama

thumb_up thumb_down +19

A man walks into a bar and talks with his friends. One of his friends said " Hey, who farted?" When the bar closed, Joe realized it was he who farted.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

One time i ate a hamberger than an hour later i sneezed but i dont think it had anything to do with the hamberger.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

your mama so dumb her iq point is below average

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What did the three bears say when rhey discovered goldilocks? Nothing. They mauled her to death.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

i died. new product by steve jobs. also presenting icoffin, and next year icoffin 2. slightly slimmer with a lock button to keep zombies out.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Roses are red Violets are blue I have a knife Take off your clothes

thumb_up thumb_down +17

what said the girl when the roof collapsed over her nothing she died

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What did the prostitute get after sex? Syphilis... she got syphilis

thumb_up thumb_down +17

A pedophile walks into a daycare

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why did the zombie go to school? Zombies do not exist and certainly do not go to school.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

wnba

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Person 1: Knock Knock Person 2: Who's there? Person 1: Knock Knock Person 2: Who's there? Person 1: Knock Knock Person 2: Who's there? Person 1: A deaf guy

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Q.) How do you fit a baby into a bowl? A.) With a blender! Q.) How do you get it out? A.) With Tostitos! -Sebastian and Chris (aka 100 and Zelot) (we did not make this joke, we just had to share it)

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What did the parrot say to the cow? Moo

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why is Joel so gay and skinny? He was raised by goats with eating disorders.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Dislike if you are gay (watch how many dislikes this joke gets :P)

thumb_up thumb_down +17

do you know what i see in the perfect girl? my dick.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, it was kind of by chance that it crossed the road and what is the big deal lots of animals cross the road. For example possums, squirrels, deer, raccoons, cats, dogs, rabbits do pretty often too it's weird because sometimes more rabbits cross the road on Easter I don't know if that's just me though, chipmunks, bears, over in Africa probably tigers and lions cross those roads.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

what do you call a man with no arms or legs? handicapt

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What's green and has wheels? A bus. I lied about the green.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why did i drink 4 sodas? Because i was thirsty

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Whats worse than scraping your elbow and knee? Beheading and disembowlment.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops