What did the boy with no arms get for Christmas Mittens

How u know when ur sister have periods... Fathers dig taste like blood

there were 2 sausages in a frying pan. One sausage says it sure is hot in here. The other one says WTF a talking sausage!

AHAHAHAHAHA XD I cant for the life of me imagine Donald Duck accusing anyone of being a seducer XD, my eyes are tearing up XD If I do not type anything more, its because I died of laughter and joy XD But those "cartoons" where made for adults, ever seen steamboat Willie? That is one of my favorites, I always liked Mickey Mouse a bit better, Donald kinda changed a lot.

Roses are red Violets are blue this poem makes no sense Potato

Q: How do you get a one armed blond of of a tree? A: You grab a ladder and help her down safely.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Thats where the slaughterhouse is.

Your mom is so ugly that she decided to work as a prostitute and she died a virgin.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? She is blind and is therefore ineligible for a driver's license.

what do you call a animal with 3 horns. a triceratops

whats small and has four hoofs? A sow

why did the farmer cry after a phone call? he just found out his wife just died of lung cancer

what did eminem say to dr.dre? nothing u idoits dr.dres dead he is locked in my basement

Your mom is so fat that she is fat.

Your mamma is so fat that she went on a diet.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, My van is coming, I'm gonna get you!

Roses are black. Violets are grey. I'm a dog...

What's 17 times worse than a 3? I don't know, personally I don't think 3's are so bad.

Haikus are useful Actually they are not.... ....I am so sorry

What has wings, is bald, and can't fly? A bald eagle. I lied about the part where it can't fly.

KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? all my friends break the door down...oh alright then ill answer i guess WHO IS IT? THE REAPER oh s*** dude! [panic face] NO ONES HOME? "In other news tonight, 2 local men found murdered in their living rooms, after looking up common joke style called antee joke. Police say the door was smashed in an obvious sign of forced entry. They seem to have just mysteriously had sudden heart attacks and fainted. heh heh...hey nancy....why did the chicken cross the road? [=< heh heh" "y" "because he thouroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic" "HAHAHAHAHAHAHA *GASP!* X.x dead face "NANCY! NANCY!.....well in other OTHER news ive just murdered nancy, and thats no joke." *runs*

Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

why did the chicken cross the road? orange you glad I didn't say banana

Roses are red Violets are blue Pump up the pasta You need bigger boobs

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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