how to you kill a black man. with a weapon.

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#scabbers

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When life hands you lemons, Squeeze them in the eyes of children

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Why does Michael Jackson have difficulty playing chess? Because he's dead, and if there is an afterlife, we don't actually have the ability to know that it is possible to play chess there.

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Q. Why did the Mexican have to go back to Mexico? A. His mom died in an auto accident and no one in her village could afford to organize a proper funeral.

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asparagus

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girl: Daddie, what's at the end of a rainbow? Dad: No sweetie, a rainbow is acually just an illusion constructed by the refraction of light white as it passes through a water particle in the stratophere. Acting as a prisom the particle will seperate the different components of light, ordering them by the rank of the light energy and the intencity of it's frequency and wavelength.

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If we all evolved from apes. Abbie didnt go that far

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What is better than winning a medal at the special olympics? Not being retarded

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A woman goes into the supermarket and buys a single banana, a canned meal for one and some ice cream. While paying for her items, the cashier looks up at her and says "I can tell you're single" "Oh yeah? How'd you know?" The woman asks. "Because you're ugly as fuck." Replies the cashier.

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What has wings and flies at night? A black man with wings

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What does KFC stand for? Kids Fattening Center

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What do you call a guy who makes jokes about a girl being in the kitchen? Single.

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What do you call a person who is 6 feet under? Lost.

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A moose walks into a grocery store, he asks the deer where he could find some bisquits, the deer says "oh it's in aigle 6." So the moose goes to aigle 6...and there ain't no bisquits!

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Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the water? A: Drowning.

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What's so sad about a bus with mentally handicapped children falling off a cliff? There was one empty seat.

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Yeah? You like that? Its like art for some.

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Q: What's black and blue and hates sex? A: The 8-year-old boy tied up in my garage.

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What do you call a black man with a group of 5 white guys? Friends. What do you call a white guy with 5 black guys? a diffrent ratio of black and white friends.

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Knock Knock Who's There? The Police The Police Who? Uhm, Ma'am your son just died in a car wreck

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What is worse then dropping the soap? Not being able to pick it back up.

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How do you drown a blond? Hold her head under water until she finally stops thrashing around.

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What did the doctor say when he lost his glasses? Where are my glasses?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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