If god gives you lemons You find a new god.

What's worse than a giant paint bubble? TWO GIANT PAINT BUBBLES!

what do you call a dog with no legs? doesnt matter what you call him, he aint coming!

Q: Whats worse that 10 dead babies in a trash can? A: 1 dead baby in 10 trash cans.

How do you get a clown off a swing? You hit him with an axe How can you release your anger at somebody? Kill them How do you stop a bus? Throw small children at it

69. Yeah- that's my street address.

A Tatooine moisture farmer, an old man, an astromech droid, and a potocol droid walk into a cantina at Mos Eisley Space Port. The bartender says, "Hey, we don't serve their kind here! Your droids will have to wait outside." The moisture farmer then says to his droids, "Why don't you wait out by the speeder, we don't want any trouble." The protocol droid replies, "I heartily agree, sir."

What can Harry Potter NOT see with his glasses? His parents...alive.

You are what you eat, so... Can we not talk about this? Cause for me it's recently been sort of sexual. ... How can it be ?.... Ohhhh, dude, that's disgusting...

why are they called the melbourne storms? Because you turn 360 degrees and walk away

How can you upset Helen Keller? In Braille spell out that she can't see or hear the hunger games

Why did i drink 4 sodas? Because i was thirsty

I did your mom..... A favor..... By making you..... A sandwich...... With mustard.....

Q: Whats worse than 8 babies in one bin? A: 1 babies in 8 bins

A priest, a rabbi, and a whale sit down at a bar. The priest says to the bartender, "Jesus Christ is our savior." The rabbi responds, "No. Our savior has not yet been born." To which the whale adds, "MMMUUURRRAAAAAAOOOUUU!!!"

wanna hear a joke? not really

How did the cat die of indigestion? Indigestion

what do you call a man with no legs? disabled.

Why was the little boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his face. Why was the little girl sad? Because it was her frog.

What do you call a black person that went to medical school? A doctor

What do you call a fly with no wings? A fly.

guess what chicken butt

Why does Polly want a cracker? Because meth is too intense.

Why cant Roger drive a tractor? Because Roger is a goldfish.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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