Roses are red, Violets are blue, I wanted to be cool, But I look like you

What do you get if you cross James Bond with Osama bin Laden? James bin Laden.

Why are black people good at basketball? They practice

What's worse than smelly feet? Smelly hands.

what do you say when you see a winner weaner

Jared Gough is a slut

Ay Bee Cee Dee Ey Ef Gee Haych Eye Jay Kay El Em En Ow Pee Queue Our Es Tee You Vee Doubleyou Ex Why Zed Now you know your ABC, come along and sing with me!

A: how do u wake up lady gaga? B: you poke her face

how many prostitutes does it take to fix a lightbulb? it depends how much you pay them

I like to eat people

What did the homeless man get for christmas? NOTHING, he died.

How many Amish people does it take to change a light bulb? None because they don't believe in technology.

Black people. They are so kind.

What three letters alter boys into men and girls into women? The letter containing their bank card, the letter containing their national insurance card and the letter accepting them into a job or higher education placement.

why wouldn't the boy shake his teachers hand? his abusive father cut it off with an axe when he was a child

Yo mama so fat!... we are very concerned for her health.

What's the best thing about having sex with twenty eight year olds? There's twenty of them.

What did Greg say to John? Nothing. Greg died in a horrible plane crash

What did the boy say to his dad when he realized he was gay? Dad, I'm gay.

A man walks into a bar. We see him as he approaches the register wearing a dark hoody. The surveillance camera seen here catches a glimpse of the man's face appearing to be a white male with mustache and beard. As you can see the man opens the register and takes the money before the bartender can get to him. If you have any information about this crime please call crime stoppers at 1-800-GET-HELP. In other news, the DOW JONES reached a record high today as investors in China begin working on keeping the economy from plundering.

Yolo: Your Oppurtunity Lies Upon...... oh, wait upon starts with a u... YOLU

what did the little girl with no arms or legs get for her birthday? a bike.

what does adolf hitler and jewish people have in common? they *** and **** but **** will always **** that hard but **** is ****** up rather ******, and they don't eat bacon

Why didn't the little boy believe in Santa Clause? Because' he saw his parents putting presents under the tree, and saw his over weight father eat all the cookies.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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