Two 50 year old men walk into eachother on the street. one was born in a hobo shack and another was born in a mansion. what did the rich one say to the poor one? Hi, whats your name?

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why did the little girl fall off of the swing? She didn't have any arms.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Your mom is so ugly she plans on using you college funds for getting plastic surgery

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What happened to Emma? I raped her!

thumb_up thumb_down +12

A pregnant women walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender denies her service because she is under the legal age.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why doesnt the ladder work? A ladder is an inaminent object therefore imcapable of having a job.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What did the kid use to smell his food His nose

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Question: How many rocks does it take to make a pancake? Answer: Tree.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

A chicken met a chicken, And they were chickens two, Two chickens met two chickens, And they were chickens too. Four chickens met a boiling pot And they were chicken stew.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

An elephant and a rabbit sit on the forest floor and poop. The elephant asks the rabbit " doesn't it annoy you when the poop sticks to your fur?" "no" replies the rabbit. So the elephant picks up the rabbit and wipes his but with him.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Knock Knock Whose there? Get out of the bathroom Get out of the bathroom who? No, your in the bathroom

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What's green and has wheels? A bus. I lied about the green.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

No, but it was a nice chance to pretend to, that was the scheme part I might have mentioned, people never figure out that you are fucking them over at the present, if you tell them you fucked them off in the past, they start thinking backwards, often ignoring those tiny details straight in front of them. Listen, call me a bit paranoid, but who the hell is Septimus and AzureDragon or whatever the fuck his little geek name was?

thumb_up thumb_down +10

whats beter than a dead pile of babies? the alive one that has to eat its way out

thumb_up thumb_down +10

why was the little girl crying? because she was molested

thumb_up thumb_down +10

why was the horse sad his wife had terminal cancer

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What is white on top and black on bottom? Society

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What's black on top and white on bottom? Rape.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What's 9+10=? 19

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Grandma got ran over by a reindeer. She died.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Knock knock Who's there? Prost Prost who Prostitute

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What do you call a unicorn without a horn? A horse.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

wheres a place a cancer patient cant go? the hairdressers

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What do you call a man who has no heart? Dead

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops