How many dead babies does it take to paint a house red. Babies, especially dead ones cannot paint.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing set? Because she had no arms. A: Knock knock! B: Who's there? A: Not Sally.

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How do you torture Helen Keller? Give her a cheese-grater and tell her it's a book.

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What can you eat that comes in all different flavors. Chex mix, I bet you thought it was women but its not its chex mix

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(Knock Knock) Who's there? You were late paying your mortgage and now your house is being repossessed by the bank.

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And now, A cow pretending to be a man: Jeff: Alan, are you a cow? Alan: What?! No! Cow: Yah me neither you guys want to go skatebords? *Awkward*

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What did Tim play with his friends? Nothing. He has no friends.

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What do you call a man will dementia who just killed his cousins, wife, children, and teacher. His name. He's still a man until he's put in a mental institution.

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What's worse than 1000 babies stapled to one tree? 1 baby stapled to 1000 tress.

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Q: What did the prostitute say to the other prostitute? A: I have AIDS.

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Whats black and white and red all over? A penguin in a blender

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A little boy started choking on a condom. His father came and was in a great panic. "Please don't leave me. I don't want to lose you!" he cried over and over again. Then his wife came in and said "it's alright darling, there's plenty more in the drawer". "Oh, thank God for that, I thought I lost it there!" dad replied.

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There was an Irishman and an Australian who walked into a bar. There was also an American, who didn't. Why didn't the American walk into the bar? He was a midget.

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Why God isn't a woman? Because Moses wouldn't last it 40 days on the mountain if that was true. And he also wouldn't come back with only 10 rules.

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What did one gorilla say to the other? Urgh.

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knock knock who's there GET IN THE VAN!

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Whats sad about 4 black guys in a cadillac driving over a cliff? A cadillac seats 5

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hey guys check out my cool youtube video at https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ivQ_bezJjK0

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yo mama is so fat that they call her fat mama

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Your mom is so old so will die soon.

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24

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? None, now stop hallutinating about wood chuck.

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What Do You Call A Swimming Banana.. Nothing Bananas Are Inanimate Objects Therefore It Would Be Impossible For It Swim

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knock knock. Who's there? John. John who? John Wayne Gacy.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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