Q: How do you get a one armed blond of of a tree? A: You grab a ladder and help her down safely.

There once was a man from Nantucket, whose dick was so long he could provide women with more pleasure than the average male.

Why did Riley cross the road? A: I lied he started to then proceeded to get hit by a bus filled with children causing them all to be scarred for life.

What is big and white, not the moon CC

Did you hear the story about the divorcee who was concerned about ecology? Her husband had been hitting her. Good for her to get away from that kind of abuse.

Why did the girl ask her brother for aids? Because her room was a mess

Jacob went onto anti-jokes cause Brock told him to and Jacobs his bitch.

Person1: Why did the chicken cross the road? Person2: I dunno.-. to get to the other side? Person1: :( I dream of a better tomorrow where a chicken can cross the street without having his motives questioned

Mr. Burns sex scandal.

knock knock. Who's there? John. John who? John Wayne Gacy.

A kraut walks out of a synagogue with no one dead

A rabbi walks into a bar mitzvah

Roses are red Violets are blue im a retard dictionary

What do you call an 8 foot anxious priest painted purple named harold? Harold.

What's Brown and sticky? A stick!

How do you confuse a blonde? Ask her what her name is

Why are pirates called pirates? Because it derives from the Latin word, pirata.

How do you make time fly? You throw a clock off a building

What did Dela Ware? Nothing.

A blond, a brunette, and redhead are trapped on an island. They all try to swim across shark infested waters to the mainland. While they're swimming, the blond turns to the redhead and says, "This water is mildly cold." The redhead replies "Yeah."

Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

What's the difference between a dead baby and a ferrari? One is a sports car and the other is a baby that is not alive.

Why couldn't Jim pogo-stick? He didn't have one.

What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas ? Cancer

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...